Because
by Kelly of the midnight dawn
Summary: Epilogue up COMPLETE! Elliot and Olivia explore a relationship. EO of course. Please read and review.
1. Chapter 1: Admitting

Because

Disclaimer: Not mine.

A/N: My other stories are taking too long so I thought I'd write a bit of an EO oneshot. It isn't fluff, it might be a bit dark but I think it turned out pretty good. Please R&R

"Why Olivia?" his voice is low and harsh. He's losing everything, its all crumbling around him, he's losing control and she stands in his way, not letting him sink.

"Elliot leave," she tells him forcefully, taking a step back from him. He's angry, she can feel it radiating from him. He's starting to scare her as he takes another step towards her.

"I don't need to see Huang or any other shrink for that matter!" he screams "There is nothing wrong with me!"

She backs away again. She wonders why it is she let him in tonight in the first place. He says there's nothing wrong with him but it is more than obvious from his behavior that something is "Please? Just leave Elliot," her voice is meek, small, timid, her voice is not her own at this moment.

He advances towards her again "Why?" he asks in a low tone that sends fear coursing through her blood.

She steps back once more, her back hits the wall. She has been cornered, cornered by her partner, cornered in her apartment. Even if she was anywhere near her gun at this time, she could never bring herself to pull it on him. She's never felt more vulnerable as he advances towards her once more.

"Why?" he asks again. He places both his feet onto hers so that she cannot kick and with his hands he pins her wrists to the wall. She is stuck, she is at his mercy, she is trying her hardest not to cry, more than anything she wants to run but she is backed into a corner.

"I was worried," she says meekly. She tries to find anywhere else to stare but finds her gaze always being pulled back to his. He glares cold and hard at her with blue eyes that have seen the hell of the world. She tries to wriggle her right wrist free but to no avail. He only clamps his hand tighter around it.

"I don't need your pity," he snarls at her, leaning forward, pressing her hard against the wall.

"Elliot!" she commands, attempting to regain control of the situation "Let me go!" He leans more heavily on her. Almost impossibly, pressing her even further into the wall. His hands clamp tighter around her wrists and he stomps his left foot down on her right one.

He isn't responding to her attempt at authority and she has no other choice but to beg "Please Elliot," she whimpers because that is the most she can manage "Your hurting me. Please let go," she tries to keep the tears from her eyes but they spring forth anyway. Without a free hand to wipe them away, she begrudgingly allows them to fall down her face.

He sees her tears and it is only then that he realizes what he is doing. Quickly he pulls away.

Olivia crumples to the floor, not so much from physical pain as from the emotional agony that he has inflicted on her. The only man who she has ever really trusted has shattered that trust in all of five minutes.

"I'm sorry," is all he can say for himself. He knows that this is not enough, that somehow more words are needed to describe how what he has just done will never leave him. How the sight of her tears on her face and the knowledge that he is the one responsible for putting them there will haunt his every waking and sleeping moment for the rest of his life.

She remains sitting on the floor, her legs curled up to her chest, her arms wrapped around them, her head buried deep in the little ball of self loathing and shame that is her. She doesn't speak, doesn't look at him, all that can be heard is her soft, almost silent sobbing.

He doesn't know what to do, what to say. He wants to know if she is alright but he knows that he has lost the right to touch her, he knows that he shouldn't even be standing in her apartment at this moment but he can't leave her.

"Liv," he says, his voice full of the old concern and protectiveness that she has come to depend on.

She dares to glance in his direction. The utterance of the nick name, the one word that he had been the first to use, a small sign of affection between them has caught her attention. It always makes her heart skip a beat when he says those three little letters. She stares at him and through her tears she can see that he is hurting too. This was exactly the reason that she had talked to Huang about him, exactly the reason she had been worried. Because in the last year and a half, there have been moments where he becomes someone completely different, moments where Elliot Stabler is lost and she doesn't know where he is and it seems these days that Elliot is not with her at all, even when he is standing right next to her.

He takes in her silence. He wonders if the nick name is yet another thing that he has lost privilege to. He takes a step towards her again but recoils when he sees her flinch. Instead he drops to a sitting position on the floor in the exact spot where he had previously been standing.

The two of them sit, legs crossed, on the floor of Olivia's apartment, with a good five feet between them, simply staring at each other. Silence reins but neither makes a move to leave. The situation is uncomfortable for both of them but somehow they stay in spite of the discomfort because even though what has just occurred is painful for both, their friendship means enough to them that they are not willing to abandone it just yet.

"I was worried," she says again, wiping the tears from her eyes only to have them replaced with fresh ones.

"I know," he responds, looking down to play with his shoe lace "I'm sorry I… I have no right… to ever… I'm so sorry." He can't get out a full thought. He can't find the exact words to express the guilt, the shame, how he could have easily taken it further, how he is so afraid that he could have lost it and in an instant taken what no man should ever take from his partner, how he feels dirty now, how he is so lucky that she stopped him with her tears.

"Its alright," she attempts to reassure him, always more than ready to forgive the trespasses of those that she loves.

He can't believe what she has just said. He knows dam well that it isn't alright. If she only knew the things he could have done if he hadn't stopped, she wouldn't be so willing to forgive.

But she does know. She knows all to well what can happen when a man can't stop himself. She credits him with the self control to pull away because he is the first who has.

"Please don't worry about me," he tells her. He knows now that she was right to worry, that something is indeed wrong with him but that she shouldn't concern herself with it. Because what has just happened tonight in this room is affirmation of the fact that she is too good for him and so he makes a silent vow right there as he sits on her floor, as he plays with his shoe laces, he vows to talk to Huang in the morning, to seek out real help because he knows as he looks up at Olivia, that she is worth it.

"I do worry," she tells him, not backing down from the conversation, in spite of everything that has occurred tonight, not willing to abandon him. He may have shattered her trust but he hasn't vaporized it. Trust in Elliot is something that she is willing to spend the time rebuilding.

"Why do you worry?" he asks. He can't think of a possible reason that she could still care enough about him after what he has almost done.

"Why do you always argue nature verses nurture?" she responds with her own question. She knows that when he finds the answer to this question he will find the answer to his own.

He pauses to remember. It has been a while since he has gone to argumentative lengths to convince her that she is nothing like her father. He thinks why he argues that point so vehemently with her. It was because he wanted to protect her, because he cares about her, because…

"Because I love you," he says aloud "Because I can't bare to think of you hurting, because I can't think of a day without your smile," the words come out and he realizes what antithesis they are in contrast to his actions earlier "Do you?" he asks, needing to know if she truly loves him, if she possibly still can after the humungous ass that he has shown himself to be tonight.

"Always," is the one word that drops from her lips. Forgiveness is something that she will allow him, forgiveness is something that she will let herself spare to him, with all the broken trust, still she knows the good man that he is, that he will get through this, that he will come back to her.

His heart jumps with the realization. She loves him, she loves him! He will definitely go to see Huang. In that instant he wonders if Huang is still awake. Then he decides to hell with it if he isn't. Elliot will drag Huang out of bed himself to get the help that he knows that he so desperately needs to never hurt Olivia again like this. He springs to his feet and rushes to the door.

"Goodnight Liv!" he calls back joyously as he approaches the door "I'll see you tomorrow."

His hand is on the door knob when he feels her hand on his shoulder. He turns to face her to notice eyes that no longer hold tears. A soft smile graces her lips as she speaks "Tomorrow is Saturday."

He smiles and nods "I meant what I said. See you tomorrow," with that he is out the door and on his way to see Huang.

Olivia shuts the door behind him and leans against it, the soft smile still on her face. She doesn't know about his plans for a late night shrink session but she does know that he changed for the better during the time he was in her apartment.

She knows that things have changed between them but she can feel deep down a warm feeling that things will be alright. No matter what she knows that it was Elliot Stabler and not his alter ego that promised to see her tomorrow. She knows that it was Elliot Stabler that told her "I love you"

It will take a long time for the wounds of tonight, the wounds of the past year and a half, to heel but as she gets ready to go to bed she thinks that "I love you" is a good start.

THE END

A/N: Well that's it. I dedicate this story to everyone who has ever read or reviewed a fan fiction ever and to all the writers of fan fictions and also to anyone who has ever watched an episode of SVU. In the immortal words of Kermit the Frog "Someday we'll find it… The rainbow connection… The lovers, the dreamers and me." You are all wonderful.


	2. Chapter 2: Impartial Impossible

Because

Disclaimer: Not mine.

A/N: It started as a OneShot but by popular demand (insert drum roll) here's chapter 2. Enjoy.

"I love her!" he shouts at the top of his voice as he paces back and forth in the living room of George Huang's apartment. The proclamation is somehow soothing to his soul, the more he says it the better he feels but at the same time it injures him to know that he does. Somehow it would be easier if the things he has done tonight were done to a woman for whom he has no such feelings.

"I'm very happy for you," the normally professional man is sitting on the couch, staring at the roaming detective with sleep filled eyes, his voice saturated with sarcasm. He still doesn't quite comprehend why it is that Elliot Stabler, a man who in the past has shown nothing but distain for the profession of psychology, has shown up at his door at 1:30 in the morning seeking professional advice. Advice that, fifteen minutes later the good doctor is still not awake enough to supply.

From what George's partially awake mind can deduce, Elliot is in love, not just in love but madly in love but that he has done something to hurt this person and that he wants help to make sure that he never hurts this person again. He knows this much but he doesn't know for the life of him who this person is.

Since Elliot's arrival he has only referred to this woman as her and the confusion added to the rude awakening that George Huang has already dealt with this evening is turning his calm and professional demeanor into one of irritation and just all around pissiness.

Elliot continues to pace, he continues to irritate George with his constant mention of "her" the pacing and talking begins to give George a headache. Against the better judgment that he would possess if he were awake, because Elliot is bigger than he is, he stands and approaches his restless friend. He grabs Elliot's arm causing the detective to stop and spin around.

Frustrated, George yells at the love struck fool "Who! Who Elliot! Who are you in love with! Who did you hurt! Was it your ex-wife!"

Elliot stares at him like he's from Mars. Like even thinking that he could be involved with his ex-wife anymore but aside from the confirmation that it is not his ex-wife that he has hurt, there is something deep in his gaze that says that he almost wishes that it was.

The gaze itself is powerful enough to shake George into full consciousness. He returns to his seat on the couch, his air of professionalism returns and in the soft psychologist voice that he uses with all of his patients with the addition of extra compassion because this is his friend he is talking to and his friend is obviously in pain, he speaks.

"Who is it Elliot?" he asks but when he sees Elliot sink into a chair across from him and lay his head in his hands, George isn't sure he wants to know. He doesn't need the confirmation of what he already suspects. He knows that Elliot loves Olivia. He knows that Elliot has loved Olivia for a long time. He has known it much longer than Elliot himself has. He just doesn't want to know that Elliot has it in him to hurt her. He doesn't want to know that he has but he has to know if he is going to help Elliot.

Elliot is silent for a long time. He stares purposefully at the carpet. Purple and orange triangles amongst yellow and red squares, a pattern that is not Asian in appearance but then again. Why should it be? Not every man of Chinese descent has to decorate their homes with Asian patterns. He focuses on this and any other random thing that comes to his mind because in spite of his desire for help, he is trying so hard not to think about what he has done.

"Olivia," the four syllables are out in the room now, hanging in the air, wafting heavily down upon the two men who now have to deal with their utterance.

In an instant George's attitude has changed from one of concern for his patient, to one of concern for the person who isn't there "What did you do!" he screams, jumping out of his seat and lunging at Elliot. Lifting the larger man out of his chair the doctor draws his fist back as if he will strike. Olivia is like his sister and if Elliot has caused her to suffer, then Elliot will feel worse, much, much worse. He is about to bring his fist forward when he catches a glimpse of the tears that are in Elliot's eyes. Once more George returns to the couch and resumes his role as therapist. Although the ability to remain impartial has long since been bleed from the situation.

Elliot sits again. Unable to look the doctor in the eye he speaks softly "I almost… I… I was angry and…"

"What did you do?" George asks yet again, this time in a lower tone of voice, though it still contains an edge of ferocity that causes Elliot to feel uneasy.

"I was angry," he says again, hoping that the smart ass psychologist will figure it out before he has to say it himself.

"You were angry?" George repeats, not fully understanding, his clarity of mind partially occluded by his concern for Olivia "Why were you angry?" he asks, in an attempt to remain professional, while every bone in his body wants to jump across the room and beat this man into a fine mush.

"Because she talked to you about me," he answers. He answers only what the question is not wanting to admit it yet, admit what he has almost done. If he admits exactly what it is that he has almost done, not wanting to admit the intentions that were in his head just before she started to cry.

"Elliot," George begins, trying to find the correct words and filter out all the obscenities before he speaks "Olivia came to me because she was concerned about you."

"I don't deserve her concern," Elliot says in a tone devoid of emotion as he wipes his eyes on his sleeve.

While at this moment George can't really find it in himself to disagree with the man, he grapples with his personal feelings to stay professional "Why do you think that?"

"I had her pinned to the wall," he admits, he doesn't want to hide anymore, its 2:30 in the morning. He's emotionally and physically drained. He needs to confess it all, besides if he doesn't he's pretty sure that George will kill him "I had her against the wall… I told her that I didn't need her pity… I hurt her… I stomp hard on her foot," he stops because he can't tell the next part, because the next part hurts him even more than he will ever let on.

"What happened next?" George asks, still on edge but trying for the life of him to stay compassionate to the man sitting in front of him.

"I would have…" he stops, he hopes that George will catch on.

He does "You would have raped her!" he is angry it takes everything that he is to keep himself sitting. He clenches his fists and looks at Elliot to continue.

Elliot nods.

"What the hell were you thinking Elliot?" George asks, his tone low and menacing, one small curse word managing to slip in.

"I've lost my wife," Elliot begins "She took my kids. I haven't seen them since… well… its been a long time," he takes a deep breath "I didn't think I had lost my sanity until I was there… pinning my partner against that wall… about to do the one thing that I could never fathom anyone doing to her."

"What stopped you," George asks, his anger seething deep within him.

"She was crying," Elliot answers simply.

At the mention of this George Huang allows himself to relax the tiniest bit. The fact that tears can stop Elliot Stabler proves that he still has a conscience, that he still has a soul, that there is hope for him after all.

"That isn't even the worst part," Elliot continues, needing to purge his stained soul.

George closes his eyes taking deep breath after deep breath. How could it possibly get worse.

"She forgave me," Elliot says, the tears falling freely in spite of his efforts to stop them "She forgave me," he says again "I don't deserve forgiveness. She deserves better."

George nods in understanding. His fists relax slightly. He can tell that the man in front of him is suffering enough on the inside with out adding external pain.

"I really have lost myself," Elliot continues to lay his words out in front of the doctor.

George nods.

"She said she loves me," Elliot keeps going, keeps talking, keeps telling the psychologist things that he would normally keep inside. There is only one reason he is doing this and she is more than worth it to him "She said she has, will always love me. I don't know why. She can do better, she should do better. I hate myself."

Silently George nods again. At this moment he hates Elliot too "Why did you come to me?" he asks.

"Because I love her," Elliot answers "Because she is worth making myself better. Because I never want to see her cry and know that I am the cause again," he stands and moves towards the door of the apartment.

George rises from his place on the couch and follows Elliot to the door. For the second time that night Elliot feels the presence of someone behind him except this time when he turns to face the presence he sees nothing but anger.

George speaks in a tone laced with harsh anger "You definitely need help Elliot but not from me."

Elliot stares at the man.

"I can't remain impartial. Go somewhere else."

Elliot nods and turns to leave when George says something that confirms his extreme anger.

"If I hear anything about you hurting Olivia again," he pauses and then drops the bomb "I will kill you."

Elliot nods, knowing if he does ever hurt Olivia again that he deserves to die. He leaves the apartment. Walking to his car he thinks about his words to Olivia. About how he would visit her in the morning, now he doesn't feel like he can.

TBC

This is chapter two. Please tell me what you think.


	3. Chapter 3: December 24th

Because

Disclaimer: Not mine.

A/N: Thank you for sticking by me. Here's chapter three.

She sits on her couch, flipping through the TV channels. Its Saturday morning, there's nothing good on but its something to do. She's waiting for Elliot. She realizes that he never told her what time he would come over. So she sits on her couch, waiting for a phone call or anything, not exactly watching the TV but keeping it on and flipping through the channels because its something to do.

In all this waiting that she is doing, never once does she think that she shouldn't have forgiven him. Not for a single second does she wish that she had sent him away. The pieces of broken trust still amount to more than she can ever say for any man who has come and gone from her life before.

Men who have used her, taken advantage of her, broken her heart more times than she can count, Elliot is worth more than all of them put together. She doesn't doubt her love for him. She does doubt that she is worth loving. She wishes that Elliot will call soon. She wants desperately to hear his voice, to hear him say 'I love you' she wants to be reassured because she loves him and needs him. No matter what he has done, no matter what he might have done, he is still the one man on this earth who can make her smile. Not just the fake smile that she puts on for photos and because its socially acceptable but Elliot can make her feel genuinely happy. He is the only one who can but she has never told him.

She checks the clock. It is almost noon. She is becoming increasingly restless sitting on the couch. She decides to go for a walk. She picks up her cell phone and drops it into her pocket. If Elliot calls her apartment and there is no answer, she knows that he will call her cell phone.

She grabs her jacket out of the closet and her keys from the counter. Opening the door she makes her way down the hall, down the stairs and out onto the sidewalk. The air is crisp and she pulls her jacket just a little bit tighter around her as she walks down the street.

She doesn't know exactly where it is she wants to go. She just knows that she wants to go somewhere. So through the streets of Manhattan she walks, confident strides that obscure her underlying insecurities.

She finds herself standing outside the 1-6. Even on a Saturday she can't get away from work. She turns away from the precinct and walks in a new direction. She still has no idea where she is headed but its better than waiting at home, alone for a phone call that deep in her heart, she's afraid won't come. She needs him to call but she isn't sure that he will. After all he was in a tight spot when he told her he loved her. She replays all of the previous nights events over and over in her head. Replaying the events is painful. She feels a slight twinge in her wrist as she remembers. In spite of the pain, she knows that she still loves him, has loved him for a long time and will continue to love him, tears well up in her eyes as she thinks that he might no longer feel the same. He probably said "love" to mean the way a brother loves as sister or a partner loves his partner or a friend loves a friend. Because after all what is friendship but a type of love. She wants him to love her, the way she loves him but somewhere inside there is that doubt that she is perhaps not worth his love. If he is willing to give her love, than can she live up to what he expects?

It is as she is walking past a drug store that she is reminded of just what Saturday it is. A young woman with dark brown hair and shining blue eyes in a bright red uniform is standing outside the door of the store ringing a bell and standing next to a tripod. Underneath the tripod, swinging gently in the slight wind is a red Salvation Army kettle. It is at that moment that Olivia remembers, it is Saturday December 24, Christmas eve.

Olivia approaches the woman in red. She pulls out her wallet and searches for some money. She finds a five dollar bill and places it in the kettle. The already smiling woman's smile becomes even broader as she acknowledges Olivia.

"Thank you and have a happy holiday," a brilliant twinkle dances in the woman's eyes.

Olivia returns the woman's good wishes "Happy holidays too you too," she says this while flashing a smile of her own. It is not the smile that Elliot can charm from her but it is close.

The Salvation Army is something about the modern world that doesn't make her feel bleak and down. They are dedicated to helping people, granted they help people in a different way than the police do but they help people all the same.

As she walks away from the drug store she isn't surprised that she has forgotten that it is Christmas eve. Work has gotten in the way of her sense of time and ability to remember the date, yet again. Besides it isn't like she usually remembers anyway. Christmas with her mother was never that wonderful of an occasion anyway and since her mother died she hasn't had anyone to celibrate with.

It is just as she turns a corner that she thinks about what she will do to commemorate the holiday. She could go see one of those horrible horror movies that always seem to open on Christmas. She could sit at home and watch some old corny Christmas specials that will most assuredly be on. Corny though they may be, the Christmas specials are a wonderful little escape from life and the endings of more than a few have been known to make her eyes mist over.

She turns another corner and the sounds of Christmas music reach her ears. She comes out of her thoughts yet again and takes in her surroundings. For some reason her feet have taken her to Rockefeller Center. She stares up at the massive tree, a symbol of the Christmas season, she wonders when the last time was that she had a tree at Christmas.

It was her first Christmas living on her own she remembers. She was eighteen, she wasted no time getting out of her mother's house. She had wanted to do Christmas right and she had gone looking for a tree but by the time that she had gone to get one, she couldn't find one. So she came back into the city, having begrudgingly excepted that a fake tree would be better than none. Only to find that the only fake tree left in the store was just a tiny 1 foot thing. She had bought it as well as a strand of white lights and she had set it up in her apartment.

She had no ornaments but she enjoyed the tree all the same because it was the first one she had ever had. She had no presents to go under it but she didn't care because it was her tree, it was her Christmas. She stands looking up at the tree and thinks about these things. She wonders if she still has that tree and those lights. She makes up her mind to set them up when she gets home.

Her gaze shifts from the tree to the ice skaters below. She notices a little girl who appears to be no more than three or four years old and must be skating for the first time in her life. The small girl slips and slides and eventually gives in to gravity as she begins to fall. A young man possibly in his thirties is standing right behind her. The man catches her before she hits the ice. Olivia watches as the man that is obviously the little girl's father takes the girl by the hand and together they skate away. Deep inside Olivia feels a twinge of something, not quite regret but close, that she never had someone to be there to catch her when she fell.

Something else catches Olivia's attention as the father and daughter skate out of her view towards the other side of the tree. It isn't something on the ice but someone off the ice. A familiar someone who is leaning against the railing, watching the skaters, she approaches him slowly.

She can tell that he too had been watching the same father and daughter when he turns to her and without even batting an eyelash he begins to speak in a reminiscent tone.

"That's exactly what happened the first time I took Kathleen skating," Elliot's eyes are misted over with memories.

Olivia reaches out and places a hand on top of one of his as it sits on the railing. She can tell something is up with him and she has a good idea what it is "Will you see them this Christmas?" she asks, probing for the information she needs to confirm her suspicions.

"No," he answers as he turns away from her and back towards the ice.

The answer is exactly the one she was afraid of and she has no response. The two just stand there, watching skaters flying by, skaters who's lives appear much less complicated than their's do at this moment. Olivia takes in the situation and almost wants to laugh. She has managed to wind up in Rockefeller Center on Christmas Eve at the same time as the man she loves. Its almost like one of those happy endings from one of those corny Christmas movies but this moment is far from the perfect moments from the movies. The two of them are barely acknowledging each other and Olivia doesn't know if Elliot truly loves her or not. This moment is not a Hollywood ending by a long shot. 'Besides' she thinks sarcastically 'those perfect endings have snow.

A few moments later, soft flakes begin to drift down over the scene and Olivia can't help but laugh out loud.

"What?" Elliot asks, turning to her with surprise and amuzement dancing in his eyes.

It is something that she hasn't seen in his eyes in a long time and she takes a moment to appreciate it before answering "Its just so ironic," she answers, beaming.

Elliot understands exactly what she means. He has been thinking the same thing, about how love isn't as perfect as it is in the movies. As he looks at her smiling face, knowing that this is her true smile, that in the snow, by the tree, with him, she has smiled. As the snow falls in her hair he can't resist leaning in and kissing her on the lips.

The kiss takes her breath away but she recovers and quickly deepens it. The hand that is not on the railing of the skating rink goes to the back of his head and his free hand does the same. Snow surrounds them but between them no flakes can slip. When they separate they are both smiling.

In a slightly breathless voice Olivia asks "Does this mean that you still love me?"

Elliot pauses and wondering how she could doubt that he loves her. Again the events of Friday night come back to haunt him. In time that the kiss lasted, there was nothing but him and Olivia but without her lips pressed to his life crushes him once more. Finally he answers "I will always but do you really…?"

"Yes," she answers, cutting him off.

"How can you forgive me?" he asks softly, brushing snow covered bangs from her face.

She looks up at him and answers as honestly as she can "Because you are the kindest man that I've ever known. One night of anger won't change that."

"But Olivia.." he starts to protest but again is cut off once more by her confession.

"Because someone like me doesn't deserve you, because you didn't go as far as…" she pauses and breaks eye contact with him "as far as," she chokes back a sob "as others have."

He understands immediately and draws her close to him. The soft snow continues to fall around them. He wants to do anything to make this better but he doesn't know what he can do.

An idea dawns on him. He pulls away and catches her gaze in his "When I saw Huang last night…"

She cuts him off again but this time out of surprise "You saw Huang?"

"Yes," he answers before attempting to continue but she isn't done yet.

"Last night? After you left my place?" she can't help a small chuckle escaping her lips. 'Maybe' she allows herself to think. Elliot makes a small coughing noise and she returns her attention to him.

"May I finish?" he asks jokingly.

She nods.

"He said he couldn't be impartial and that I should go to someone else," Elliot explains, deliberately leaving out Huang's death threat because he would like to finish his thought before she bursts into giggles "Maybe we should see a therapist together?" he suggests.

"Like marriage counseling?" she smirks "Why Detective Stabler is that a proposal?"

Elliot looks at her seriously "Not just yet it isn't."

His answer has thrown her for a little bit of a loop. Her question was asked in all fun but he does love her that much to be thinking about it.

"I wouldn't mind going to therapy with you," she answers, still smiling but smiling in all honesty and with genuine intentions.

"And the other thing?" he asks. Now it is his turn to be the playful one.

"We'll see," she answers, leaning into his embrace.

He smiles as he kisses the top her snow speckled head "We've got a long way to go Liv," he says as he breathes in her presence.

"Yes we do," she says, content in his embrace "but I think we'll make it," she pauses and then she adds "and do you know why."

She tilts her head up to gaze directly into his eyes and the two of them answer at the same time.

"Because I love you,"

THE END (or at least I think it is. But if you want more I think I have another chapter in me)

A/N: Well that turned out a bit more fluffy than I intended but what can I say. I'm in the Christmas spirit. Happy Holidays to all and to all… Please review.," she says, content in his embrace "but I think we'll make it," she pauses and then she adds "and do you know why."

She tilts her head up to gaze directly into his eyes and the two of them answer at the same time.

"Because I love you,"

THE END (or at least I think it is. But if you want more I think I have another chapter in me)

A/N: Well that turned out a bit more fluffy than I intended but what can I say. I'm in the Christmas spirit. Happy Holidays to all and to all… Please review.


	4. Chapter 4: Car Trouble and CoaCoa

Because

Disclaimer: Not mine, Dick Wolf takes all credit for the characters and if anyone knows if he's hiring, please let me know.

A/N: Well this is a little late for Christmas but I subscribe to the theory that every day should feel like Christmas.

She rings her hands out in front of her, just in the path of the stream of warm air. She turns to face him, glad that he had conceded to drive her home.

As if he had a choice. He would never let her walk home by herself in the snow. The snow has intensified in the hour since they stood beneath the Christmas tree and darkness is coming faster because of the thick cloud cover. He drives her home because he believes that in the end he is protecting her. Deep down he feels secure giving her a ride because he loves her, because he feels in control, because he knows that if his control wavers, that she really wil kick his ass this time. He wonders why she didn't do it the first time. He decides to put that thought out of his mind for the moment and continues driving.

Out of the corner of his eye he watches her. She is gazing at him with nothing but love and understanding, the same way she has always looked at him and he wonders for the billionth time that day what it is in his life that he has done right to deserve her. He finds it hard to think of anything good he has done, in his mind the one thing that he has done to absolutely not deserve her overshadows everything.

The snow has reached white out conditions now. The tale lights on the car in front of him are barely visible as it turns down a street. Elliot is forced to give his full attention to the rode as he skids across the snow.

"Oh shit!" he exclaims as the sound of the car's bumper scraping against the curb and the unmistakable sound of the engine sputtering into silence is clearly heard by them both.

Olivia involuntarily reaches a hand out and places it on his arm, holding him in place as if she is afraid that he will launch into a rage. He feels her firm grip and turns towards her. His eyes meet hers and he smiles self deprecatingly.

"This storm sucks," he says with a hint of laughter in his voice that instantly relaxes her.

"Guess we should assess the damage," she suggests softly, a slight smile playing on her face at how comfortable she feels in this situation.

Elliot nods and attempts to open his door, but a telephone pole blocking it from opening more than an inch causes him to turn back to Olivia again. This time his eyes beg a favor of her.

Olivia chuckles "That's okay. I'll look," she opens the passenger side door of the car, leaving the comfortable warmth of the heater and Elliot's company for the cold snow filled New York air.

"Be careful!" he calls after her as she closes the door behind her so as to keep the heat in the car.

At least one of them should stay warm she thinks. She ignores his warning because it is simply a snow storm. After all what could possibly happen?

She slowly picks her way around the front of the car. The unique calm of the city at this moment strikes her as odd. It is still only 4:30pm. Even though it is Christmas Eve, people should still be out and about doing last minute shopping. Then again the populous in general could very well have been driven into hiding by the blizzard. It is definitely a blizzard she decides as she fights to keep a hand on the car simply because she cannot see it through all the blowing snow. Her feet slip and trip in loose piles of fluffy snow and she wonders how the weather turned so bad so quickly.

In the car Elliot leans forward, pressing his nose almost to the windshield, squinting through the snow so as to keep track of Olivia. He sees a bare hand on the hood of the car and a blurry figure attached to it. He knows that this is Olivia and he wonders why she didn't think to wear gloves today. He feels incredibly stupid for having car trouble on Christmas Eve, for having to ask Olivia to go out in the snow, for the frost bite that she will undoubtedly have later on tonight because of it.

Elliot reaches for his cell phone in order to dial triple-A. He pulls the antenna up and flips the phone open. Attempting to turn it on he discovers that the battery is dead.

He curses himself inwardly, his eyes still focused on Olivia's hand as it traces the hood of the car. In twelve years with SVU he has never had his cell phone run out of power when he needed it as desperately as he does now. He allows his head to drop slightly as the phone slips from his hand and lands on the floor at his feet. Getting angry won't help him right now so he continues watching Olivia. He wonders how bad this snow must be for her to be taking so long when the hand, which has made it all the way to just outside the driver's side window, suddenly separates from the car and is lost in a see of white.

His heart stops. He peers through the snow and sees nothing. Fast as lightning he leaps out the passenger side door and is starting to run around the front of the car, only to find himself slipping in knee high drifts of powdery white 'pain in the ass.'

"Olivi-!" he calls out her name as he slips, landing flat on his face in the snow. He is frozen straight to his core now but he doesn't care. He attempts to get up, spitting snow out of his mouth in massive quantities. He stands to his feet and is about to continue on his hell bent quest to find Olivia, when he sees her standing in front of him. The flakes fall in droves between them, making it hard for him to make her out clearly but he can still tell that she is smiling broadly. He hears her laughter clear and light, like the bells on Christmas day.

She holds out her hand and helps him back to the car, standing outside the passenger side door as he slides across both seats. She slides in after him and makes a face when she realizes that he has managed to completely drench her seat in the five seconds that he was sliding over it.

"What happened out there?" Elliot asks, still very concerned.

Olivia holds up a penny "I found this," she smiles.

"A penny?" Elliot asks incredulously.

"Its good luck," she protests "and in a storm like this… well its gotta be extra lucky to find one."

"Maybe for you," Elliot mumbles as the effects of landing in snow begin to take there physical toll on him "How's the damage?" he adds.

Olivia is still smiling but she feels sorry for Elliot as she slips the penny in her pocket. He always worries about her and that concern is the reason that he is in the sorry state that he is in now "You crushed the hole front corner of the car," she responds honestly to his question "You'd better call a toe truck."

Elliot looks sheepishly at the floor of the car where his phone lies, open and lifeless "Umm…" he begins "My phones dead."

Olivia simply hands him hers and smiles sympathetically "Happens to the best of us."

Gratefully excepting her phone he dials the number for triple-A. He speaks to the man on the other end of the line and frowns. It will take at least an hour if not more for them to get a truck out in this weather. He is freezing and he can tell that Olivia is too. Without the ability to turn the car on, they can't have heat. He hangs up with the triple-A guy and turns to his partner.

"Its going to be a while. What do you want to do?" he asks sincerely.

She smiles as she looks at something just over Elliot's shoulder "You hungry?" she asks.

Elliot turns following her gaze to see a neon sign for a small diner shining clearly through the snow "How did we not notice that before?" he says amazed.

"No idea," Olivia shrugs once again opening her door and stepping out into the cold.

Elliot quickly follows her. He doesn't want to lose sight of her again, not even for a moment. The adrenaline from his earlier experience has not fully dissipated yet and he is on edge.

The two enter the small establishment side by side. Both breathe a sigh of relief as the warm air from the room hits them instantly when they open the door. They make there way over to a table in a corner by a Christmas tree. They both remove their jackets using the clothing as a way of laying claim to the chair that each wishes to sit in.

Olivia drops into her seat and inhales deeply. The tree is real and the smell of pine needles is wonderful. The lights on the tree are colored and on top of the tree there is an angel. Olivia gazes fondly at the tree and decides that this is what her dream Christmas tree would look like.

Elliot catches the wistful far off look that has just appeared on her face and wonders as he follows her gaze, what it is about the tree that has sent her into this daze. He too looks at the tree fondly. He remembers every Christmas tree that he and his kids decorated together.

He would always make time at Christmas for decorating the tree with them. He took sick leave if necessary at Christmas time just so he could be with his children when they decorated the tree. They had never missed a year, until now. Elliot sighs as he wonders just how the tree will look this year. It hurts him deeper than he will let on even to Olivia that he can't do something as simple as decorate a Christmas tree with his children anymore.

The home made ornaments, the old family ornaments, the angel for the top of the tree, he will miss them all. Not so much the physical items as the process of putting them on, the stories that are told about each as they are handed off to one child or another.

He remembers that it is Elizabeth's year to put the angel on top. When the twins were younger Elliot would lift the one, whose year it was to put the angel on top, onto his shoulders so that they could place the angel safely and securely in its place of honor on the tree.

Both detectives are so lost in their own thoughts that they don't notice the waitress approaching. She smiles when she notices the two of them lovingly staring at the Christmas tree. She doesn't want to disturb them but it is Christmas Eve and she would like to get them fed and sent on their way as soon as possible. Its not that she's a bad person, she just wants to be home tonight. Her shift ends at six and she doesn't want to be kept too much later.

She gives a small cough to make them aware of her presence.

Olivia is the first to look up "Um, hi," she says in a slightly embarrassed voice.

The waitress smiles "Hi, I'm Julie. I'll be your server today. Can I get you guys something to drink?"

"Just water for me thanks," Olivia answers then turns to Elliot, silently bidding him to order.

"Same here," Elliot says simply still focusing primarily on the tree.

"Alright," Julie smiles "and do you know what you want to eat?"

Without warning Elliot answers "Apple pie and hot chocolate."

Olivia looks surprised for a moment but smiles and turns towards Julie "That sounds good. I think I'll have the same."

Julie finishes writing down the order and walks off to the kitchen.

Once she has gone Olivia turns back to Elliot "Why apple pie and hot chocolate?" she asks.

Elliot shrugs "Because its Christmas," he offers simply. The truth is that apple is his favorite type of pie and that it is the type of pie that Kathy would always make for Christmas dinner. Apple pie is just another thing that reminds him of the good times with his family. He has ordered hot chocolate because he is cold and wants hot chocolate but just saying 'Because its Christmas' is all he feels like revealing at this time.

It's strange that even though he has told Olivia about skating with Kathleen, that he is unwilling to tell her everything just yet. He knows that she too is holding secrets. He remembers how she was looking, is still looking at the tree in the corner and decides to ask her about it.

"What do you think about when you look at the Christmas tree Liv?" he asks.

She looks at him and considers how to answer. She loves him but she doesn't know how far in to her world she wants to let him. It is because she loves him that she wants to keep him just at the edge of her world, to protect him. She mulls the true answer over and over in her head, attempting to reword it to make it sound better. She comes up with an answer that is not exactly a lie but not the whole truth either "I always wanted a real Christmas tree."

He wonders if that is the exact truth but doesn't want to push her for fear that she will push back. He decides to continue the conversation "We always had a real tree at Christmas," he says and then without realizing it his next words betray him "I remember we had to sweep up all the needles and one time Maureen took all the swept up needles and-" he stops himself before the sentence is finished but it is too late.

Olivia's curiosity is peeked. She reaches her hand across the table to his and holds it gently "What did she do with the needles?" she asks softly with just a hint of a sad smile on her face.

Elliot looks into her compassionate eyes and finishes the story "She took them from the dust pan and glued them onto a picture that she had drawn of a Christmas tree. She gave it to me to put on my desk at work," he pauses "You know? She was only five years old when she did that. I don't know why I'm thinking about it now."

Olivia's sad smile remains on her face. Maureen made that picture sixteen years ago but Olivia has seen that picture recently, on Elliot's desk "You kept it all this time," she says. It isn't a question, it is a realization. Her sad smile widens just the slightest bit.

He smiles at her just as Julie returns with their pie. Julie puts down the pie and leaves. Her shift is over and she is out of there. They won't have to worry about the tab because she has already paid it for them. She can't explain it but she just got a good vibe from them.

When she has left Elliot leans in close to Olivia "Have I told you in the last ten minutes that I love you."

She smiles. The truth is that he hasn't said it in about two and a half hours but she isn't going to say that "I love you too," she responds then kisses him deeply.

A/N: Okay I don't know if this is the end or not but this is something. Please R&R. If you would like angst I could probably get that in there somewhere. Thanks in advance.


	5. Chapter 5: A movie and a memory

Because

Disclaimer: I wish they were mine but they aren't.

A/N: Here's the next chapter. If you haven't seen the movie "Borrowed Hearts" there are spoilers for that in this chapter and if you have seen it then you are a very, very lucky person (one of the sweetest movies ever)

"You still cold," they are sitting on Olivia's couch and she has just wrapped the third blanket around her shoulders.

"A little," she answers shivering. The toe truck had been able to get them to Olivia's apartment building and she had invited Elliot to stay for the night because the snow storm continued to rage outside.

Elliot has brought a duffle bag from the car up with him. When Olivia attempted to ask why he kept a bag of clothes in his car she was met with only silence as a reply.

Currently they are watching television on Olivia's couch. Some Christmas movie that neither of them knows the name but both try and lose themselves in the fantasy that it promises.

"Do you even know the title of this movie?" Elliot asks her.

She searches her mind long and hard. The title is on the tip of her tongue "Borrowed Hearts," she answers finally "I remember that that actress was on 'Touched by an Angel' and that guy is on 'Will & Grace'"

"It's a good movie," he says leaning back against the back of the couch.

"Yeah," Olivia says with a sigh. She focuses on the screen again. Kathleen Russell has just told Mr. Field that his Christmas decorations don't seem 'homey' enough. An idea strikes her and she springs from the couch, shedding her three blankets and heading for her bedroom.

"Hey where are you going?" Elliot asks, surprised at her sudden movement.

"I'll be right back!" she calls. She opens the door to her closet. Pushing aside clothes she uncovers a box. Opening the box she pulls out her fake tree and her strand of lights. Smiling she returns to the living room with them.

"A Christmas tree!" Elliot exclaims as if he is a little kid.

She can't figure out weather he's truly excited or just trying to keep her from feeling bad. She decides to take his words at face value and just smiles at him as she attempts to untangle the strand of lights.

Elliot is completely truthful in his joy at seeing a Christmas tree, even if it is small and fake. He smiles watching Olivia hopelessly struggle with the lights. He rises from his spot on the couch and goes over to her.

"Want some help?" he asks smiling broadly.

Olivia looks up at him. He looks far to amused for her comfort but she shrugs and hands him one of the ends of the strand.

"Why is it?" Elliot asks simply and seemingly philosophically.

"Why is what?" Olivia returns in the same seemingly introspective tone.

"Why is it that your such a great cop but such a cluts with Christmas lights?"

She makes as if to punch him but begins to giggle instead.

"What is it?" he asks.

"I'm not the only one who doesn't have a clue here," she informs him.

It's true. Not only have they not been able to untangle the lights but they have managed to get themselves tangled in them as well.

Elliot throws his head back and laughs "Wow. I'm so glad no one is here to see this," he pulls Olivia close to him and the two of them continue to laugh.

"Hey Elliot?" She asks, looking up at him with laughter dancing in her eyes.

He takes a moment to appreciate her laughter before responding between his own giggling fits "Yeah?"

"How do we get out of this?"

"Do we have to get out of it?" he asks, tickling her just a little bit.

"Stop," she squeals with delight, pulling slightly away from him. She can't get far because she is still wrapped in the lights with him.

"A ticklish cop," Elliot chuckles "who'd have guessed."

She looks up at him mischievously "If you tell anyone," she leans close and kisses him on the mouth "I'll kill you," she backs away as far as the strand of lights will let her.

"I guess," Elliot begins "that its in my best interest to get out of this situation as soon as possible," he continues to laugh as he slides the strands down his body until he can step free of them leaving Olivia still tangled.

"Hey no fair," she protests.

He comes over to her and helps her out of the lights "Just hold still," he tells her, finding it hard to keep the laughter out of his voice.

"Just shut up and help me," she tells him, her voice still playful.

"I am helping you," he informs her "I don't have to be quiet to do that. Do I?"

"I'd appreciate it if you were," she retorts, feigning annoyance.

He has her out of the lights in no time. Holding them up he smiles at her "We must have done something write. They're untangled," he wraps the lights around the tree and places the tree on a table near one of the windows in the living room.

While he is bent over searching for an outlet to plug the lights into Olivia heads back into her bedroom to find something else to put on the tree. The tiny tree and its simple lights had always been what she had and she had never felt ashamed of them. Maybe once in a while a tad disappointed but never ashamed but this year there is someone with her, someone who is used to real Christmas trees with ornaments and she feels embarrassed that her Christmas tree is so shabby by comparison to what she imagines Christmas trees at the Stabler house must appear.

She rummages through her closet tossing clothes, shoes and other such things out of her way. She comes upon a small box, not much bigger than two cubic feet. She takes it out and holds it in her hands, staring at it as her emotions battle inside her. This box, she knows contains her entire childhood. She is horrified that her whole childhood can fit into a single box but at the same time she feels a bit of comfort that she has these things with her. The few items that are contained in the box do have some pleasant memories attached to them.

She opens the box and immediately picks up her old teddy bear. He is small and very much warn almost all over his body. She hugs the bear to her chest and sighs.

She holds the bear up in front of her face and gives him an appraising look. He is a tiny bear, even a little girl would find him almost too small to cuddle she thinks. She remembers the lonely nights when her mother wouldn't get home until three and she would lie awake in bed, scared, huddled under the covers with this bear, whom she had named Herman.

She reaches into the box again and pulls out a well worn copy of "The Cat in the Hat", the only book that her mother ever read to her. She feels her eyes begin to mist over when she remembers how safe she felt curled next to her mother, on those nights when Serena was sober, and listening to her read the familiar words.

She Is startled by a noise behind her and quickly puts the bear and book back into the box and shoves the box out of site in the closet.

"What's up?" Elliot asks, standing in the door of her room. He doesn't dare step into the room, he is afraid of scaring her, he is afraid of scaring himself, he doesn't think that he has the right to enter, not yet.

"Nothing," Olivia says hurriedly, standing up and closing the closet door, hoping against all hope that he hadn't noticed.

"Liv," Elliot begins gently, still not willing to take a step past the threshold of the door "Come watch the rest of the movie with me?" he asks. He isn't exactly sure why it is that she has taken refuge in her room. He hopes it isn't him.

Olivia is taken by surprise by the request, by the sheer timidness with which he has asked. She nods and walks out to rejoin him on the couch.

She catches sight of the tree and is shocked. In addition to the simple white lights that look absolutely perfect the way that Elliot has arranged them, there are at least five paper cranes nestled among the artificial needles.

"How?" she exclaims softly as she moves towards the tree, taking one of the delicate birds into her hands. She smiles when she notices that it has been made from a piece of notebook paper and the fringes are still intact.

Elliot hugs her from behind. He bends his head just slightly and whispers in her ear "I'm a man of many talents."

Olivia tilts her head back and looks into his eyes "A cop who knows origami, who'd have guessed?"

Elliot spins her around in his arms and kisses her deeply "You know," he begins before kissing her a second time "I really do love you."

"I know," she says before wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him as close as physically possible. When she separates from the kiss she adds "I love you too, very much."

They spin each other around on their way back to the couch, to the tune of a holiday commercial on the television. Elliot sits down and Olivia follows, still in his arms. She pulls the blankets up around them and they settle back into watching the movie.

"So was that guy an angel or what?" Olivia asks. The movie has ended and now the two are lying on the couch, just talking.

"I'm not sure," Elliot replies. He feels so comfortable with Olivia but at the same time he wonders if he should feel so comfortable. He has thoughts that run through his head that he doesn't trust, urges that have become harder to control since his wife left him, a little voice that has been getting louder over the past year that he's been trying to ignore, trying to fight. He runs a hand through Olivia's hair in an unconscious motion as he thinks to himself about what he has become since his wife left him.

"Do you believe in fait?" Olivia asks, effectively bringing Elliot's mind back to the present.

"That's a pretty vague question," Elliot says somewhat sleepily. It has been a long day and he can't discuss vague concepts just yet.

"Yeah," Olivia responds in the same tone. She too is tired but is curious to know the answer "Do you believe that things happen because they're supposed to, that there's a reason for everything?"

"Is that fait or is that destiny?" Elliot asks, finding himself drifting off.

"Doesn't matter," Olivia answers. When Elliot doesn't respond she realizes that he is asleep. She carefully removes herself from his arms and covers him with her share of the blankets before she retreats to her bedroom.

She pulls a t-shirt and sweat pants from a shelf in her closet and lays them on the bed before pulling her shirt off over her head. She pulls the t-shirt on and pauses just a moment. The shorter sleeves of the t-shirt have left her wrists exposed.

As she gazes down at her wrists, she can see the faint purple bruising that has formed where Elliot had grabbed her. She gives only the slightest of shutters before she pushes the memory out of her mind and continues getting ready for bed.

When she has finished dressing and has returned from the bathroom after brushing her teeth, she sits on the edge of her bed. She can hear Elliot's breathing, strong and steady from the other room. The memories flood her mind again. She wonders if she is really ready for this. If she is really ready to have him spend the night. She rises from her bed and goes over to her bedroom door. Quietly she pushes the simple button on the door knob, effectively locking the door and securing it against intruders.

Returning to her bed, she thinks to herself that counseling really will be beneficial for them both.

TBC

A/N: I really would love to know what ya'll think of this chapter. I know that it is way past Christmas but I just have to keep writing about Christmas for a bit longer. Reviews are always welcome.


	6. Chapter 6: Merry Christmas Olivia

Because

Disclaimer: Not mine

A/N: I know it's a little late for this but I had specified earlier that this was Christmas 2005 and I'd like to get it finished before Christmas 2006. Hope ya'll enjoy and as always please review.

He wakes up early, 5:30am according to his watch. He rolls over on Olivia's couch. He sees that the lights on the tree are still on and he smiles. He sits up and wonders if the snow has stopped. He walks to the window and looks out. A thick white blanket covers the city but the snow has stopped falling.

Out of the corner of his eye he catches sight of the tree again. It strikes him that there are no presents beneath it, not that it is big enough for a great deal of presents but it reminds him that he doesn't have a gift for Olivia. He sits on the couch again and puts his head in his hands. How could he have not bought her anything for Christmas? Fate has conspired to push them together on Christmas and he doesn't have a present for her.

He takes a pen from his bag and tares a piece of paper from his notepad. He scribbles a quick note and puts it under the tree. He gets up and walks into the kitchen to see what he can fix for Christmas breakfast.

Olivia's dreams are oddly peaceful considering her thoughts before she fell asleep and considering that she hasn't had a peaceful dream in what seems like years. She awakens with Elliot's name on her lips and his face in her mind.

She stretches in her bed and swings her legs over the side. She puts her ear to the door before opening it. She can't hear Elliot's breathing. She wonders if something's wrong. She tip toes out to the living room but she doesn't see him on the couch.

She smells something sweet. The smell is coming from the kitchen. She turns to see Elliot's smiling face.

"Merry Christmas," he says, holding his arms out and embracing her tightly.

"Merry Christmas," she smiles as she draws his lips to hers and they kiss.

The kiss lasts for several seconds until Elliot pulls away "Are you hungry?" he asks leading her into the kitchen.

"Starving," she answers, not able to stop smiling. She stops when she sees what it is that he has prepared "What the heck?" she says softly. She is staring at a plate of rice crispy treats.

"C'mon," he encourages her "sit, eat, they're good," he sits at the table and grabs one of the treats and takes a bite.

"They aren't exactly breakfast food," she says, following his lead and taking a seat across from him.

"I did the best I could with what was available to me," he says around a mouth full of his breakfast.

Olivia looks down at her table top, feeling a small blush creep across her cheeks "I don't go shopping a lot," she admits.

"You certainly have enough candy to last a lifetime," he smiles.

Olivia laughs and picks up a rice crispy treat. She notices the red and green M&Ms that she had bought last week, dotting the confection "Chocolate is a girl's best friend," she makes an attempt to explain her extensive candy cabinet.

"That doesn't explain the marshmallows," he chuckles "Or the gummy bears, or the butterscotch-"

"Okay," she interrupts him "I like candy. Is there a problem?"

"No," he shoots her an innocent smile. They continue eating their unconventional breakfast.

"We're probably going to have stomach aches for the rest of the day," Olivia laughs as she grabs her fifth rice crispy treat.

"Maybe," Elliot concedes "but I think it'll be worth it."

Olivia pauses in her chewing and thinks about it. This is certainly shaping up to be the most interesting Christmas she's ever had. A traditional Christmas breakfast for Olivia is usually just a bowl of cereal or a power bar. She thinks about Elliot's last statement and nods, this is definitely worth it.

"When do you think we'll be able to get out of here?" Olivia asks. They are once again curled up together on her couch, watching the TV. The news informs them that New York City is in the process of a massive digging out after being buried under four feet of snow on Christmas eve.

"Why do you want to get out of here?" Elliot asks "Its warm in here."

"I don't know," she says, running a hand through her hair "I just don't want to spend the whole day cooped up in my apartment."

"Put your coat on," he says suddenly.

"Why?" she asks a little confused.

"Let's go play in the snow," he says, grinning like a little boy.

"Are you nuts?" she asks, pulling away from him just enough so she can look him in the eye. She decides that he's serious about what he has just said.

"C'mon," he says, nudging her slightly "It'll be fun."

She stands up and pulls on her coat "I'll take your word for it," she says.

"I surrender!" Elliot throws his gloved hands up in defense. Olivia has cornered him by a park bench and stands ready to fire a snowball directly at his face.

She looks at him for a moment, his hands razed in surrender, his face pleading for mercy. She pats the snowball firm in her hand "Take no prisoners," she smiles devilishly as she launches the snowball.

He tries to duck but the snowball hits its mark all the same "Burr," he shakes the snow from his face "That was just cold Liv."

She just grins at him "Its snow Elliot, it's supposed to be cold," she laughs.

He pulls her close to him "Okay," he smiles "You won," he rubs his cold wet cheek against her warm dry one.

"Eww," she laughs and pulls away slightly "Do you know how many germs are in that snow? In this city, its probably full of cat pee or something."

Elliot grimaces "You threw it and now," he pulls her close again and kisses her face all over "You have to live with it."

She giggles uncontrollably, she can't remember ever feeling this happy before "Okay," she says as she pushes him off "That's enough."

"You hungry?" he asks, once the two of them have stopped laughing.

"Yeah," she nods "but what places are open on Christmas?"

"I'm sure we can find some place," he says and the two of them walk off in search of dinner.

An hour later the two of them are sitting on Olivia's couch, eating Chinese food straight from the little white take out containers.

"Which Christmas special is this?" Olivia asks, reaching across with her chop sticks and snagging a dumpling from Elliot's container.

"The Little Drummer Boy," Elliot answers as he fumbles with his own chop sticks in an effort to get a bite in before Olivia takes it all.

Olivia laughs at his failed attempts to manipulate the utensils "Like this," she says, holding out her hands and demonstrating the correct technique as she steals yet another bite of food from him.

"Hey," he protests as he tries to get his fingers around the sticks the way she does "You have your own food."

"I know," she smiles "but you need to learn."

"Learn what?" he says perplexed "We're not in the Serengeti, we're not lions and this," he gestures towards the food "is not a zebra carcass, what am I learning?"

"How to use your chop sticks," she smiles.

The two become silent as they watch the movie. Elliot watches Olivia closely out of the corner of his eye. He has been perfecting his technique while she has been engrossed in the movie. He watches and waits for his opportunity. The time arrives.

"Hey," she says as some of her own food is taken by Elliot.

"Serves you right," he says around a large bite of lo mien.

"See," she says in an all knowing tone "I told you. Competition is the best way to learn."

"You never said that!" he protests "You just kept stealing my food."

"Actions speak louder then words," she grins and reaches over in an attempt to steal some more of his food.

"How's this for an action," he laughs as he pushes her hand away and lifts his container of food above his head.

"Elliot!" she says when she notices the container start to tip "Put it down before you get MSG all over my sofa!"

Elliot obliges but not before a piece of chicken falls out of the container and lands on his head. Olivia attempts to stifle a giggle but she can't.

"Something funny?" Elliot asks as he removes the chicken from his head and putting it between his chop sticks holds it out to her "You want some?"

"I'm not eating head chicken," she says as he pushes the chicken within inches of her lips.

"C'mon," he encourages her "Its good head chicken."

"Elli-" she is cut off when he pops the chicken into her mouth. She smiles as she chews and swallows "You ass," she scolds him, taking the takeout containers from him and setting them on the coffee table. She straddles his lap and kisses him deeply. Their tongues intertwine, exploring each other's mouths.

Olivia breaks the kiss abruptly "Was that good?" she asks.

"Was that all?" he asks expectantly.

"Yep," she says, sliding off of his lap and back to her side of the couch.

Elliot leans his head back on the couch "Now what?" he asks no one in particular.

"I don't know," Olivia says, leaning against Elliot.

Elliot wraps his arm around her and grabs the TV remote from the coffee table "What else is on?" he says as he begins to flip channels.

The Little Drummer Boy has been over for some time and the movie that followed it wasn't that interesting. Nothing good is on so he turns the TV off.

"mm," Olivia moans as she starts to drift off in Elliot's arms.

Elliot checks his watch. Its only 8:20 but he feels tired too. He pulls a blanket from the back of the couch and wraps it around them both. He drops a kiss on her forehead before he settles in and falls asleep himself.

Olivia wakes up three hours later. The first thing she knows even before she wakes up is safety, comfort and love, feelings she hasn't felt in a long time, if ever. Her eyelids flutter open and she finds herself in Elliot's arms. The two of them are bathed in the gentle light of the Christmas tree.

The tree, she looks at it and notices that there is something underneath it. She gets up from the couch, being careful not to wake Elliot and walks towards the tree. She picks up the piece of paper and unfolds it. She smiles as she begins reading.

'Dear Olivia,

I'm sorry I don't have anything for you this Christmas. So I am writing you this note to tell you that I owe you the best Christmas ever. Since December 25th is snowed out, I'll give you your Christmas some other day, some day soon, I promise.

Love,

Elliot'

She finishes reading and folds the paper up again. She holds it to her chest as she turns to look at Elliot, asleep on the couch. She walks back to the couch and reposition herself in his arms. Before she settles in to go back to sleep, she places a gentle kiss on his cheek and whispers "You've already given me the perfect Christmas."

TBC

A/N: I know that this was a lot of fluff but I promise I've actually thought of a plot. Please review?


	7. Chapter 7: Cought in the act

Because

Disclaimer: I'm getting tired of writing these things because every time I have to write one I get really depressed. Dick Wolf owns these absolutely wonderful characters I'm just trying to make their lives a little more interesting.

He stirs ever so slightly. Slowly he becomes aware of where he is and who is sleeping in his arms. He takes a moment to enjoy the sheer delight of the situation, that simple intimate moments can be achieved without sex.

He never had a moment like this with Kathy. Maybe it was because they had been forced into a marriage that neither was truly ready for. Maybe it was because of the job. Maybe it was because deep down inside they had known that they really weren't in love. What ever those reasons might have been, Kathy is the past and he hopes that the woman whose head rests upon his shoulder is his future.

He glances at his watch, its 7:00am they have to be at work soon. No rest for the wicked means no rest for the cops either. Gently he shakes Olivia's shoulder "Hey," he says gently "rise and shine."

Olivia moans and her head slides from his shoulder to his lap "Just five more minutes," she says groggily.

Elliot smiles "Sorry we gotta go," he lifts her upper body until she is in a seated position.

"What time is it?" she asks, groaning as she stretches.

"Its seven," he answers and waits for her reaction.

"Damn," she jumps from the couch and is in the bathroom in a matter of seconds. Within ten minutes, which Elliot thinks must be some sort of record time for her, she emerges from the bathroom in fresh clothes looking completely perfect. Smiling at the expression of pure amazement on his face, she tosses him a towel.

"What's this for?" he asks, still staring at her in wonderment that she can be ready so fast.

She gives him a long hard look. Her brown eyes boring through him as if he has just been beamed into her living room from a space craft "After you shower," she begins in a sarcastic tone "You use it to remove the excess water from your body."

He grabs his toothbrush and other toiletries as well as a fresh change of clothes from his bag and taking the towel from Olivia he heads for the bathroom.

While Elliot gets ready, Olivia rummages through her cabinets for breakfast for the two of them. She scoops three spoonfuls of coffee grounds into the coffee filter and fills the back compartment with water. She may not have the means to fix a four star breakfast but she can at least provide Elliot and herself with decent coffee.

She finds the remains of the box of cereal that Elliot had used the day before and pours two bowls, one for her and one for Elliot. She takes the milk from the fridge and sets it on the table along side the bowls of cereal. The coffee finishes percolating and she retrieves two mugs and fills them.

It isn't often that she has an excuse to use more than one dish at a time and somehow she welcomes the opportunity. The thought of having dishes to wash later makes her feel somehow… less lonely, more human, normal.

Elliot is soon finished getting ready and he appears in the kitchen soon after she has poured the coffee. Olivia looks up from the table as she puts the box of sugar packets between the two mugs and can't help but stare. Elliot seems to look exceptionally hansom this morning.

He chuckles "See something you like?" he asks, striking a pose.

Olivia giggles "Have some breakfast," she says, gesturing to the table and ignoring his question.

Elliot furrows his brows "Do we have time?" he asks, looking at his watch again.

"Yeah," she answers. There is plenty of time for breakfast together.

Elliot sits at the table and joins her in eating the breakfast that she has prepared.

"Do you think it'll be a slow day?" Elliot asks hopefully as he reaches for the milk and pours some into his cereal.

"I hope so," Olivia answers, dumping the contents of a sixth sugar packet into her coffee "but it rarely is."

"The snow should at least discourage a few crimes," Elliot continues to be optimistic as he takes a swig of his coffee.

"I really hope you're right," Olivia says honestly but not at all sounding optimistic. She knows that there will always be criminals and they will always find ways to commit crimes even over the holidays, even in the snow.

"Hey," he says in an effort to be encouraging as he reaches across the table and takes her hand into his "There's nothing wrong with hoping for a slow day."

She nods and is about to answer when she notices a strange expression on Elliot's face. It is at this point that she realizes that her sleeve had pulled back slightly when he had taken her hand, exposing the faint but still evident bruising. "Elliot," she begins in a soft and understanding tone.

Elliot releases her hand instantly and stands up from the table "Thanks for breakfast," he tells her as he picks his dishes up from the table and places them next to the sink "I should get going."

"We'll go together," she tells him, placing her own dishes next to the sink and turning to face him.

His future is slipping away from him and she's trying to throw him a life line but he doesn't feel like he's earned it "If we show up together they'll be suspicious." He heads for the door. Before she can stop him, he's left and she is standing alone in her apartment.

Wishing that he would forgive himself because she has already forgiven him because she loves him, she gathers up her badge and gun and heads after him.

She doesn't see him as she walks down the hallway towards the stares and she quickens her pace in hopes of catching him. She reaches the top of the stares and thinks she sees him at the bottom, she practically runs down the stares. When she reaches the bottom, she has a clear view of him, he's outside her building heading in the direction of the precinct, she breaks into a gallop. She finally catches up to him "Elliot," she says out of breath. He turns for a moment and she's got him. She wraps her arms around him tight "You planning to walk the twenty blocks?" she asks.

Elliot shrugs, he hadn't taken the long walk into consideration but it will only mean that he'll be late by fifteen minutes, ten if he runs. He'll take that chance so long as he doesn't have to look into her forgiving eyes "I'm fine." He says simply.

"I'll give you a ride," she tells him, still holding on to him tightly. She won't let him get away. She won't let him keep blaming himself.

"I don't mind walking," he says as feeble protest. He knows he's going to lose this argument.

"I forgive you," she speaks softly in his ear "Why can't you forgive yourself?"

"What I did," he says, in a voice tinged with shame "Isn't something that should be forgiven." He looks away finding great fascination with a bird that sits atop a street light. The bird is grooming its feathers, trying to rid itself of dirt that is so far engrained within that it is almost painful to remove it.

"You've been under a lot of stress," she says, pulling away and trying to look him in the eye but he will not meet her gaze "With the divorce and work and well it was inevitable that this would happen."

Elliot stops looking at the bird. He looks directly into her eyes "You expected this to happen?" he asks in total shock.

She looks away "I had a feeling that…"

For the first time since she stopped him in the street, he hugs her back. She expected him to hurt her, she expected it because everyone in her life hurts her "You deserve better then this Olivia," he whispers as his eyes fill with tears.

"We should go or we're gonna be late," she tells him, making no effort to separate from his arms.

Elliot nods and keeping one arm around her waist he walks her to her car "You wanna drive or should I?" he asks when they reach the car.

"I will," she says holding up the keys. A faint smile plays on her lips as she slides into the driver's seat.

Elliot slides into the passenger seat and Olivia puts the car in drive and heads for the precinct "What would we do?" she says half to herself as she turns the first corner.

"If What?" Elliot asks, his eyes staring straight ahead out the windshield.

"If it's a slow day," she answers "What would we do with the free time?"

"I don't know," he begins "Maybe…" he thinks about it then teasingly he suggests "a make out session in the supply closet?"

She laughs, glad that he is feeling better "That sounds like fun. Count me in." she smiles at him.

He turns and smiles back "What did I do to deserve you?" he asks happily.

She sits in silence for a while. She doesn't know how to tell him that she's the lucky one, that he's the first one whose ever apologized for hurting her, he's the one who came back to her. She can't express how much that means all she can say is "I love you."

They arrive at the precinct with only a minute to spare. The two get out of the car and side by side, resisting the strong desire to wrap their arms around one another once more, they walk into the squad room together.

Munch and Fin are already there, both look up from their desks when they hear someone enter. When it becomes apparent that it is not just someone but two someones the two exchange a knowing look and smirking they return to their paperwork. Normally, Olivia would feel like she had to defend herself by claiming that nothing happened but this morning somehow she doesn't seem to care.

"How was your holiday?" Munch asks, still looking at the papers on his desk in an effort to hide the wiseass grin that is on his face.

"It was wonderful," Olivia answers honestly as she takes her seat.

"Any particular reason the two of you showed up at the exact same time?" Fin asks, holding a folder up in front of his face for the same reason that John still looks at paperwork that he has long since forgotten.

Olivia looks over at Elliot. Even if she doesn't feel the need to defend herself, she isn't sure she wants the whole world to know just yet.

Elliot understands the meaning behind her silent words "I had some car trouble," he says to the two men who seem to have nothing better to do than pry into their lives.

"Car trouble, huh?" Munch snorts, finally looking up from his papers to study the faces of his two colleagues, searching for any sign of deception.

"Yeah," Olivia answers "Elliot's car got pretty banged up in the storm on Saturday, so I gave him a ride this morning." She hasn't lied. She has just omitted most of the story. The part about having met in Rockefeller Center, the ride home, the apple pie and hot chocolate at the diner, the movie, the paper cranes, the rice crispy treats, the snowball fight, the feeling of absolute happiness she leaves out all of these things because they don't need to be said, not to Munch, not to Fin, these things are sacred between her and Elliot now.

Munch senses that she hasn't told the whole truth, just call it his detective's instinct but he knows that something is different between those two this morning. Olivia has a glow that she's never had before, like something inside her that was wounded has begun to heal and like all healing wounds it is radiating heat and energy, the wonderful first signs of recovery. And although something in Elliot is still very much in pain, something about him is different as well. He still looks at his partner the same way but there is something unrestrained this time. Sparks have always flown between the two of them but today Munch can swear that he sees a pure unbroken current of electricity forming a connection from one to the other.

Olivia opens a file and looks through it only to look up a moment later into Elliot's kind gaze "Have you seen my pen?" she asks, not that she cares where it is.

"No," he answers as he closes the file that he is holding "I can't seem to find mine either."

Olivia smiles a small devilish grin "I'll go grab a couple of pens from the supply closet."

"Here," Fin says, holding out a pen towards her "I've got an extra one."

Olivia thinks quickly, she takes the pen and inspects it "Thanks but it's not the kind that I like. I'll be right back." She gets up before anyone can offer her another pen.

She's been gone only two or three minutes when Elliot stands up from his chair "I'd better go help her," he tells the other two detectives before following his partner.

"Elliot," Munch calls to him "She just went to get a couple of pens, its not like she's bringing back an elephant or something."

Elliot ignores him and turns down the hall, headed towards the supply closet. He opens the door to see Olivia standing there, waiting. He smiles at her "You know this was quite possibly the lamest excuse in the history of excuses." He steps inside the closet and closes the door behind him. He moves towards her and wraps her in a tight embrace "They'll definitely be suspicious now."

She giggles, the most beautiful sound he's ever heard "Let them be suspicious. I love you and I could tell the whole world."

He brushes a gentle kiss over her lips "That paperwork is just gonna pile up if we don't do it."

She moans "I could do mountains of paperwork as long as it means I get to be with you at the end of the day." She kisses him deeply.

Suddenly the peace is shattered by the opening of the door "Eh'hem," they turn to see their captain standing in the doorway.

They turn back to stare at each other. The message that passes between them is clear 'Oh shit!'

"Captain," Olivia begins somewhat breathlessly but that's all she can manage. She can't find the words to explain their actions.

"Um…" Elliot begins "We… um… pens and… do you need something Cap?"

Olivia would laugh at his nervous behavior that is so uncharacteristically Elliot. Only this time she's in the same boat.

Cragen coughs somewhat uncomfortably "We've got a case," he moves away from the closet door, beckoning them to follow him. He hopes that this conversation will be easier in a different setting.

Olivia sighs in relief as they walk back to the squad room. A case will give them something to do to keep their minds off of make out sessions. There was just something so boring about her paperwork this morning that she… who is she kidding? She just wanted to be near Elliot, to be able to feel him.

"What's the case?" Elliot asks. He is very eager to put the awkwardness behind them.

"Snow plow crews found a vic this morning dumped in a snow bank. She was taken to St. Elizabeth's. She was beaten pretty badly and raped. I want you… two to go interview the guys who found her. Their at the hospital," he makes as if he is going back into his office when he turns and looks at them again, long and hard "Um… I'll forget about what I saw back there, just try and keep it out of the office from now on," he takes another step inside his office when he turns again "and out of the office includes the supply closet." He closes the door leaving Elliot and Olivia to stare at each other in silence.

The fact that Cragen isn't more angry about what he caught them doing is shocking. They would have been lying if they said that they weren't expecting a formal reprimand or something and now that it appears that their jobs are safe, they both feel, well a little bit confused.

Olivia walks to her desk, opening the top drawer she takes out a notepad and two pens. She walks back to where Elliot stands and hands him one "You can use this." She says handing him one of the pens.

He smiles "You made that whole thing up about the pen didn't you?"

She nods, somewhat ashamed "You're surprised?" she asks and offers him the pen again "Take it."

Elliot shakes his head and walks towards his own desk. He also opens his top drawer and takes out a notepad and pen "Your not the only one who can make up a lame cover story," he smiles and the two of them walk out of the precinct together.

"You driving?" she asks him as they approach the squad car.

"Yeah," he says and they both get in. Elliot starts the car and they head for the hospital, hoping that by the time they get back the embarrassment will be forgotten.

TBC

A/N:

I crave feedback. Please review.


	8. Chapter 8: The case begins

Because

They ride to the hospital in a comfortable silence. Confusion is still prevalent in both their minds. What has just transpired is grounds to have one or both of them transferred. A transfer would be the best they could hope for, a disciplinary hearing, they could both lose their jobs.

"I'm sorry," Olivia says, breaking the silence. She stares at her hands, all she can think his how stupid it was to want to hold him, to be with him in that closet and how she wishes she could hold him again.

"For what?" he asks, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. He sees the shame and embarrassment on her face.

She looks up only briefly "That whole thing back there," she explains "I was… foolish."

"No," he tells her firmly, then thinks his answer over "At least," he amends with a small chuckle "You weren't the only one."

She laughs, a little nervously "I think we're in trouble," she feels like a lunatic for having taken Elliot's suggestion, made as a joke and acting on it.

"I don't think we are," he says as they pull into the hospital parking lot. He turns to her just before he opens the door of the squad car "No more regrets, time to work."

She smiles "Yes sir," she giggles and exits the car.

Side by side the way they always have, they enter the hospital. Shoulder to shoulder the way they have since the day they met, they approach the woman at the main desk of the ER. Parallel moving in perfect symmetry to one another, their second nature for years now, they find the two snow plow guys who sit, looking rather shaken up in the waiting room. They have always moved in tandem but to anyone who knows them, today there is something more to their perfect dance, something captivating about their teamwork.

"I'm Detective Benson," Olivia says, flashing her badge "and this," she gestures beside her to the man who she has introduced a million times before in this way "Is my partner Detective Stabler." Elliot flashes his own badge. He and Olivia take seats across from the two men.

"Hey," one of the two young men answers in a tone that conveys the shock that he is feeling. He has tried to disassociate but it hasn't worked and now these people have come to find out what he saw, which means that he has to remember that image, not that he's been able to forget. He just wishes to God that he could.

"I'm Henry Coleman," the other young man introduces himself. He too wishes that he could forget what he has seen but he knows that the quicker they get this over with, the quicker he can go home.

"Um," the other starts, uncomfortably "I'm Toby Garret."

Olivia studies the faces of the two youths. They can't be more than twenty two if that. They look like the typical small town hero boys and she wonders how it is they got messed up in this "Could you tell us what happened?" she asks, pulling out her notepad and pen and preparing to write.

"Um," Henry begins, looking at his hands "We were removing the snow from the sidewalk in front of the Starbucks on twenty fourth and we saw a foot sticking out of the snow…" he trails off, twitching uncomfortably.

Elliot feels sorry for these two boys but they need to know the facts "What happened next?" he pushes gently.

Toby finds his voice "We dug her out and," he too pauses and squirms in his chair "She was so cold but there was a pulse, so we called an ambulance."

"Okay," Olivia says encouragingly "How often do the snowplows come by that particular Starbucks?"

"There was a crew there yesterday around this time," Henry tells her "They only managed half the sidewalk. We were supposed to finish the rest today." He stops again and looks ashamed "We won't get paid if we don't finish," he mumbles, sounding unconcerned with his salary.

"What are the names of the guys who were there yesterday?" Olivia asks.

"I'm not sure," Toby answers "You'll have to check with the dispatcher." He holds out a business card for the snowplow company.

"Thanks for your time," Elliot says, standing up.

"If you remember anything," Olivia says, holding out one of her own business cards to Henry.

Henry takes the card "Thanks," he says and he and Toby disappear out the doors of the hospital and into the crowded, once again alive streets of Manhattan.

"We should go find the doctor," Elliot says to Olivia as they turn back towards the main desk.

"Excuse me?" Olivia asks "Could you tell us who the doctor is who's taking care of the rape victim that was brought in this morning?"

The woman at the desk looks through some notes quickly then looks up at the two detectives "Yes. That would be Dr. Schneider. He's doing rounds now. I'll page him for you."

"Thank you," Elliot says as the woman picks up a phone and pages the doctor.

Olivia reaches for Elliot's hand and gives it a gentle squeeze. While she would love to do so much more, she is content with this simple intimate contact. He squeezes back and smiles at her.

The doctor rushes towards them "Hello," he says hurriedly extending his hand and quickly shaking first Elliot's then Olivia's "You must be the detectives." The doctor pauses to catch his breath.

"Benson, Stabler special victims," Elliot says quickly "What can you tell us about the victim?"

Olivia pulls out her pen and pad again.

"She's in pretty bad shape," the doctor tells them "She might not make it and we don't even have a clue as to who she is." He stops and the sorrow is evident in his eyes.

"There's no ID?" Elliot asks, not too surprised. The victim had only been referred to as the victim. They had not been told a name, no approximate age, all they had was her gender.

The doctor shakes his head somberly "No ID, no wallet, no nothing."

Olivia nods in silent sad understanding "Just how bad is it?" she asks softly.

The doctor walks to the nurse's station and picks up a file labeled Jane Doe. He walks back to the detectives. Opening it he begins reading "She has multiple broken ribs," he pauses and finds himself searching for his voice "She's suffered massive head trauma, multiple lacerations and contusions," he chokes again, knowing that what he will say next is the reason that these particular detectives are here "Rape kit found semen, bruising and blood from a freshly torn hymen." He stops, having said all that he needs to.

Olivia and Elliot share a knowing look. A torn hymen means that she was a virgin up until all of this happened. Olivia pulls another business card out of her jacket and holds it out to the doctor "Thank you Dr. Schneider. Call us if anything happens."

He nods as he takes the card from her "I hope you find the guy who did this."

Olivia nods at him and she and Elliot turn to leave. She would love nothing more than to find the man responsible but with no ID and such limited information, they have their work cut out for them. They are almost to the door when Olivia has a thought.

She turns around, her eyes scanning for Dr. Schneider as she kicks herself for not thinking of this before. She spots him and runs towards him "Sorry Dr. Schneider, could we get a picture of the victim? It might be useful if we can find someone who knows who she is."

Dr. Schneider nods and heads off to fulfill the request. He returns a few minutes later and hands Olivia a print out of a digital photo "I suggest that you make a composite of that," he tells her "save some of those people the shock of it all."

Olivia nods and stares in shock at the bruised and battered face in the photo. She has seen some pretty horrific things in her job but they never cease to disgust her "Dear God," she exhales softly then looking up at the doctor "Thank you again Dr. Schneider," she turns and rejoins Elliot and they walk back to the car together.

"This is horrible," Olivia says, holding the picture out for Elliot to see.

A young woman with very long dark brown hair that someone has taken care to brush back from her face and carefully arrange on the hospital pillow tares at his heart strings when he sees the extent of the bruising on her face and neck "Bastard," he mutters, obviously referring to the man who has done this.

They reach the car and Elliot opens the passenger side door for Olivia before sliding into the driver's seat. He turns the key in the ignition and the car sputters before falling silent once again "Come on, come on," he mutters angrily as he turns the key again.

"We are not having any luck today," Olivia observes.

"I can't handle anymore car trouble," Elliot says, casting his eyes upward in a silent prayer that the car will start. Thankfully, the second time he turns the key it does.

"Yes," Olivia says, joyfully.

"Oh thank God," Elliot exhales gratefully as he pulls out of the parking lot and heads for the precinct.

"At least the perp left DNA," Olivia thinks aloud.

"Yeah," Elliot turns to her as they stop at a red light "That's something at least." He takes her hand into his "Are you okay?"

She nods "Yeah, I'm better then I've been in a long time actually. It's just…" she trails off and smiles apologetically.

Elliot releases her hand as the light turns green. He understands, she is torn up inside by every case and this one will be no exception. The rest of the ride to the precinct is made in that same comfortable silence that they have come to know so well. They know each others moods so well that sometimes words are unnecessary and right now they both feel the same thing, sympathy for the victim who still lies unconscious in a hospital bed.

When they reach the precinct they silently get out of the car. Olivia starts to walk towards the precinct when she feels her left foot begin to slide. She tries to regain her footing but soon her right foot is sliding as well. Elliot comes around the other side of the car just in time to see her fall.

One leg in one direction, the other leg in the other direction, falling backwards she tries to lessen the fall with her arms flung behind her but she only succeeds in wrenching her right shoulder very painfully.

"Olivia!" Elliot runs to her side, careful to avoid the black ice which hinders his run turning it into a sort of sporadic, jaunty motion. He reaches her and kneels beside her "Are you okay?" he asks as he reaches down to help her up.

"Yeah," she answers with a groan as Elliot slowly helps her to her feet "I'm just a bit soar and then of coarse there's the matter of my bruised ego," she chuckles self deprecatingly.

Elliot wraps his arm tight around her as they enter the precinct "That ego of yours," he laughs "You might want to consider hiring a physical therapist for it."

They enter the squad room to see three pairs of eyes watching them with interest. Munch and Fin snicker as Elliot helps Olivia to her seat. Cragen watches with a smile in his eyes as Elliot takes his own seat but somehow manages never to take his eyes off of the woman across from him.

"Um," Olivia begins, feeling slightly uncomfortable "I slipped on the ice," as if this simple explanation will stop them from staring, stop them from smiling.

"Are you okay?" Munch asks with genuine concern although he still has that glint of amusement in his eyes, visible even through his smoky glasses.

"I'm fine," Olivia says, pulling out her notepad and preparing to get down to work "Did you guys get any information from the door to door?"

"Nada," Munch says, pulling out his own notes "No one saw anything, heard anything, knew or wanted to know anything."

"New Yorkers," Cragen deadpans "God love em." He turns to Elliot and Olivia "So did you two find anything out at the hospital?"

"Not much," Olivia sighs heavily "No ID, the guys who found her didn't know anything." She pulls out the photo and hands it across to Cragen "Here she is."

Cragen takes the photo "God," he inhales sharply "This looks personal." He passes the photo to Munch who in turn passes it to Fin, all the detectives nod their agreement. The attack screams overkill, rage and familiarity.

"Okay," Cragen begins "Let's get a sketch artist to come up with something a little less shocking for the public." He looks at Munch and Fin who take the photo and head off.

Cragen then turns to Elliot and Olivia "Can I see you in my office for a minute?" it isn't spoken as an order the way he would speak if they were in trouble, instead it is a simple request, one with which the two detectives willingly comply.

They file into the office behind him, Cragen closes the door and motions for them to sit. They take their chairs across from his desk and Elliot takes Olivia's hand into his and smiles at her reassuringly. Cragen sits behind his desk and looks at them for a long time. They sit for moments that seem like hours as his stare makes them more uneasy.

Finally Cragen speaks "It's about time."

Olivia looks wide eyed first at Cragen and then at Elliot. Elliot looks back at her with a confused smile on his face "What?" they both exhale in relief.

"I've never seen two people so in love," Cragen begins "but so unwilling to admit it." He takes a deep breath and continues "Congratulations."

Olivia senses that this is not the end of it "But?" she prompts.

"But you have to keep it out of the office," Cragen tells them firmly "If IAB gets wind of this they'll have your asses."

"I'll transfer if it comes to that," Elliot says with conviction.

Olivia stares at him. He's willing to make that sacrifice to be with her. She can't let him "No," she interjects "If it comes to that, I'll be the one to transfer."

"Hopefully it won't," Cragen tells them. He hopes that it won't but if it does he will pull every last string at his disposal. They are his two best detectives, he loves them as if they were his children and nothing would make him happier then to see them happy. He knows that they will be happy as long as they are together but that includes the job. They were partners long before they were lovers and losing that aspect of their lives will most certainly hurt them deeply.

"We should get back to work," Olivia says softly, placing the hand that still clasps Elliot's on his lap.

Elliot feels a small twinge of arousal which he tries to dismiss before it causes problems "Yeah," he smiles gently at her.

"Alright then," Cragen says, standing up from his desk. As Elliot and Olivia turn to leave his office, he places a hand on Elliot's shoulder "Can I talk to you for a second." He whispers.

Elliot nods and turns back to face the captain "What is it?" he asks.

Cragen gives Elliot a fatherly smile "You take good care of her," he tells him "Because," he leans in close and whispers in Elliot's ear as if what he is about to say is the most guarded secret "If you break her heart, I'll hunt you down." These words are spoken with the concern of a father for his daughter and Elliot can't help but smile.

"Understood," Elliot says before he leaves the office and joins his partner once again.

TBC

A/N: I hope you liked it. Please let me know what you think. I live for feedback, the good and the bad. Is it too fluffy, too confusing? I also suck at casefile. So if someone could put me in my place? I don't know until you tell me. Thanks in advance.


	9. Chapter 9: Another crime scene

Because

"Thanks for your time," Olivia says to the old woman as she turns from the door and shuts it in her and Elliot's faces. She can't help but feel disappointed, this is the twentieth person that they have asked if they know the victim and all of them have said no. No one has even said something like 'she looks familiar' or 'maybe I think I've seen her'. No the answer has always been just simply no, no and then the door is slammed in their faces.

"What if she's not even from this state?" Elliot suggests. It is the only explanation that he can think of for why no one knows who she is. Munch and Fin had taken a copy of the composite sketch and canvassed the apartments and businesses closest to the Starbucks and he and Olivia have been working their way outward through the neighborhood.

"If she is from out of state," Olivia takes Elliot's supposition and runs with it "She would have had to be staying somewhere."

"Where's the closest hotel?" Elliot asks as he unlocks the car.

"There's one right across from the Starbucks where our vic was found," Olivia informs him and the two are off once more, hoping this time that they will strike gold in finding an ID for the woman in the hospital.

"Sorry I never seen her," the girl behind the desk answers as she turns away from them to answer a ringing phone "Holiday Inn… Yes… Yes… Alright." She scribbles something on a peace of paper and returns to the phone conversation.

Olivia looks at Elliot, rolling her eyes she mouths the words 'air head'.

Elliot nods "Excuse me miss," he tries to recapture the young woman's attention but fails.

She has hung up the phone but she has moved on to seemingly, at least to her, more pressing issues. Her head is bent over some paperwork and she seems to be paying no attention to the two detectives.

Olivia is just about to say something when the woman behind the desk surprises them both by popping up and smiling at them.

"Sorry," she says a little breathlessly "Its been a busy day. This close to New Years everyone wants a hotel room." She reaches her hand out towards Elliot, causing Olivia to feel a small pang of jealousy then mentally kick herself for being so ridiculous, the woman speaks again "Can I see that sketch again?"

Elliot hands her the sketch and she studies it carefully. Recognition spreads slowly over her face "Yeah," she says softly "I've seen her."

"Where?" Elliot and Olivia both ask at the same time, excitedly. This could be it, this could be the big break that they have been searching for, a lead, maybe even a name.

But their enthusiasm is short lived "Two other guys were in here with this exact same sketch earlier." She answers and then turns back to her work.

Olivia shakes her head as she and Elliot walk out of the hotel "I should have known." She says somewhat disappointedly "Munch and Fin would have already been here with the sketch."

"Let's regroup and come up with a different game plan." Elliot says as he once again slides into the car.

"This is gonna be a long day," Olivia slides in beside him and they head for the stationhouse.

"We have absolutely nothing," Munch throws his notes on his desk in frustration.

"It's like this girl didn't exist until this morning," Elliot thinks aloud, scratching the back of his head.

"Maybe she didn't," Munch adds with that 'I've got a theory' spark in his eye.

"Oh no," Fin cuts his partner off "No, no, no, no. I don't want to hear it." Fin turns to Elliot "Keep your thoughts to yourself next time man." Fin turns and heads towards the filing room.

"Just hear me out!" Munch calls after him.

Before Fin closes the door of the filing room behind him he calls out in a voice full of amusement and frustration "NO!"

"Don't worry Munch," Olivia says with a laughter tinged voice "We're listening."

"I'm just saying," John continues, with a grateful look in Olivia's direction "That our Jane Doe could be a male order bride or and illegal immigrant-"

"Or she could be a runaway from out of state," Cragen interrupts, coming out of his office and throwing a photo onto the table "I faxed our photo over to missing persons and they came back with this."

Olivia reaches for the picture that Cragen has thrown down. Their victim, only unbruised and smiling, stares back at her almost hauntingly from the photo "Who is she?" Olivia asks in a barely audible voice.

"Claire Garret, seventeen years old," Cragen answers with a quiver in his voice "She was from New Hampshire. She came to New York for break." Cragen finishes and sits on the edge of Fin's desk.

"Who reported her missing?" Elliot asks.

Cragen flips through a file he holds in his hand searching for the name "Um…" he finds it "Her cousin Toby."

Olivia feels the realization hit her. She looks at Elliot and can tell instantly that he has come to the same conclusion "Toby Garret, as in one of the guys that found her this morning?" Olivia gives a small gasp but quickly recovers.

Cragen nods.

Elliot stands up from his chair and pulls his coat on over his shoulders. An act that although so simple, has Olivia completely captivated "I think we should go question our good Samaritans again." He gestures towards Olivia who follows him out into the city streets.

"Her own cousin," Olivia says angrily as she walks beside Elliot.

Elliot looks at her and she can tell that he is as angry as she sounds. His eyes are hardened steel blue at this moment. There is nothing gentle in his mood. It is the times like this that he is most likely to hurt someone. Olivia cringes visibly because the hardness is something he had that Friday night in her apartment.

He sees the change in her. He sees her shrink back and while he is still angry he can't have her afraid to work with him. If they are going to be affective in the field they have to trust each other. When they get to the car he reaches out to her "Are you okay?" he asks kindly.

She sees a flicker of Elliot in his eyes. A flicker of the kind man who hides beneath the anger "Uh huh," she answers as she slides into the passenger seat and stares blankly ahead. The man with whom she has had the best Christmas of her life with is buried under the anger, the anger that he has when the job gets to him and the best thing now is to get through this, get through it, solve the case and then maybe the kind man will resurface.

"Olivia," he whispers as he slides into the drivers seat and turns the key "What is it?"

She inhales deeply "It's nothing Elliot. Let's just pick this guy up."

Elliot knows that something else is up. He knows his anger is scaring her but at the same time he knows that she is willing to stand beside him 'I'll make it up to you' he says to himself. He reaches across and gives her hand a reassuring squeeze "I love you." He tells her.

She smiles feeling reassured that he won't hurt her "I love you too." Together they embark on their latest test. How will this case, this perp affect their relationship is something they both worry about as they drive to the main office of the snowplow company.

"Garret and Coleman?" Mr. Peters, the man in charge of the garage where the snowplows are kept, says as he walks over to a desk where the plowing schedule is "I know them, plow 22, best guys by far."

Elliot takes the schedule from the man. He looks it over "It says here that they are the exclusive drivers of plow 22."

"Sure are," Peters responds "Every eight hours like clock work for the past forty eight."

"And this plow always goes by the same Starbucks?" Olivia asks beginning to get more and more suspicious.

"Yeah," Peters answers and takes the schedule back from Elliot "Now if you two will excuse me. I have to make sure that those plows are ready to go out again. You never know when the next storm will hit." With that Peters is gone.

"They flat out lied to us." Olivia says. They had known that Garret had lied but this new information proves that both of them had something to hide.

"We should bring them both in for questioning." Elliot says as he picks up a rolodex from the desk where Peters had left the schedule. He retrieves the address "It looks like these guys are roommates." With that Elliot is out the door again leaving Olivia in his wake.

They arrive at the apartment building and flash their badges at the doorman to get inside. In silence they proceed to the fifth floor. Apartment 5E is their goal. They reach it and are surprised to find the door left slightly open. Subconsciously both of them reach a hand down to their guns as Elliot pushes the door open the rest of the way "Police!" he announces their presence as he steps inside.

Olivia follows close behind him "Something's wrong," she says. It is more of a feeling. Call it women's intuition but as she stands in the seemingly empty living room she feels an overwhelming sense of approaching doom.

A muffled cry comes from somewhere in the apartment and both of them grow as silent as possible trying to determine where it has come from. Olivia follows the sound to a bedroom. She draws her gun in anticipation of what she might find. Elliot follows close behind, watching her movement and surroundings very carefully, ready to leap into action if it is necessary to help her.

The bedroom is small. A bureau is against one wall and against the other is the headboard of a bed. It is what is chained to the bed that makes the detectives stop in their tracks. It's Toby Garret. He has been gagged and beaten but he is still conscious, a look of pure terror is in his eyes.

Olivia rushes over to him and removes the gag as quickly as possible "Toby," she says his name and he focuses on her "Did Henry do this to you?" Toby nods. Olivia continues "Did he hurt your cousin?" Toby nods again.

Olivia fumbles with the chains "Elliot, bolt cutters." She calls frantically.

Toby finally speaks and the word he speaks drastically changes their plans "Bomb."

"What?" Olivia asks.

"A bomb," Toby repeats "There's a bomb under the bed."

Olivia bends down and moves aside the bed covers to reveal that there is in fact a bomb "Oh my God," she murmurs.

Elliot is by her side in no time. He too stares at the bomb. It is large enough that it looks like it could reduce the entire building to rubble. A timer on the bomb informs them that they have eleven minutes not enough time for the bomb squad to arrive "We don't have bolt cutters," Elliot tells Olivia.

"We can't just leave him here," Olivia says fiercely.

"I'll take his statement," Elliot tells her "You go evacuate the building."

"Elliot," she tries to keep the tears at bay as she reaches for his hand.

"Olivia," he says firmly, trying to keep the nervousness out of his own voice "This building is about to blow sky high and we have a duty to save as many of these people as possible."

Olivia nods. He's right, of course he's right but if he doesn't finish getting Toby's last words down in time… she doesn't even want to think about it "Elliot," her eyes meet his for what she hopes won't be the last time. So much is said in that quick glance.

"I know," Elliot tells her "I love you too. Now go!"

Olivia nods and runs into the hallway "Everybody get out!" she screams, pounding on the doors. All the doors open and confused faces stare at her "There's a bomb in the building!" she screams, her voice full of panic although she is trying to remain calm "Get out!" she points down the stares. As they start to run down the stares she stops one of them "Please spread the word to the lower floors?" she asks the woman.

The woman nods "But what about you?" she asks.

"I'm going up," Olivia says as she and the woman part company. As Olivia approaches the sixth floor she looks at her watch, approximately seven minutes left. She can hear the other people below spreading the warning as the building empties. She sees people coming out of the sixth floor apartment before she has said anything. Luckily it is the middle of the day and most people are at work. Unfortunately it is school vacation and most of the people still in the building are kids. All the sixth floor apartments are empty. Olivia sighs a small sigh of relief. Its only an eight story building.

Next Olivia makes her way to the seventh floor. Everyone is out and down the stares quickly. Olivia looks at her watch again, five minutes. Last is the eighth floor. She calls out and almost all of the doors open. One door stays closed and Olivia becomes concerned "Who lives in this apartment?" she asks one of the fleeing tenants.

No one seems able or cares to answer her. Olivia approaches the door and presses her ear to it. She hears a soft crying. She hits the door as hard as she can and it gives way.

A small dirty one room apartment is revealed. A crib is against one wall. A very small girl with short blonde curly hair stands in the crib. She has big brilliant blue eyes and she is dressed in a soiled red jumper with a white shirt underneath. Olivia looks around the apartment but doesn't see anyone else. That is until she has reached the crib. Lying underneath it as if stuffed there to hide it is the body of a young woman who looks very much like Claire Garret. In fact even the pattern of bruises on her body is identical to those on Claire's body.

There is no time for finding out anything about this woman how ever. Olivia looks at her watch again, three minutes. She has to get this child out safely. She grabs the toddler who cries in protest but is so weak from malnutrition that her cries aren't loud at all.

Olivia turns and runs down the stairs, holding the child in her arms. When she reaches the fifth floor she pauses only momentarily to call out one word. "Elliot!"

There is no answer and she is forced to leave before she knows for certain. The little life in her arms, Elliot would want her to save the child.

Outside Elliot stands with the building's residence. He had been able to take Toby's dying declaration and made it out with six minutes to spare. He frantically searches the crowd for Olivia. He asks people if they have seen her. Finally he finds the woman whom Olivia had asked to spread the word to the lower floors.

"She went up to warn the others," the woman informs him.

He feels the tears stinging his eyes. She didn't want to leave anyone behind. He looks at his watch, roughly one minute until… he doesn't want to consider what will happen if she doesn't get out in time.

"Olivia!" he screams, running towards the building. In the distance he can hear the sirens, he had called the fire and rescue squad as soon as he had made it outside but they won't reach the building before the bomb goes off. He has to find her. He is at the door to the building when he sees her. She is running towards the exit.

As soon as she sees him her heart sores and her feet run faster. She and the little girl in her arms reach him just as they hear a loud explosion. Elliot grabs her and pulls her and the child in her arms to safety. He holds her close as he tries to catch his breath. Neither one of them can hold back the tears anymore.

"I thought I'd lost you," he chokes out as he holds her tight and strokes her hair.

"I was so afraid I'd never see you again," she cries into his chest.

The little one who has found her way between them makes her presence known.

Elliot looks down "Who is this?" he asks, still sniffling as he tries to recover.

Olivia looks up at Elliot with a serious expression on her face "Coleman didn't just blow up the building to get rid of Toby," she looks down at the little girl whose identity is still a mystery "He did it to get rid of another crime scene."

TBC

A/N: Wow have you ever had a story that just totally got away from you? Pleas review.


	10. Chapter 10: Who is she?

Because

The fire fighters arrive and all on the sidewalk are pushed back to the other side of the street. Olivia stares up at the building as it burns. The crime scene is going up in smoke and there's nothing she can do to stop it. She clings to Elliot and the two of them cling to the child that she has found.

"He left this child to die," Olivia whispers as she continues crying. She hasn't stopped crying since she and Elliot reunited outside the building.

Elliot finds it hard to answer her. He is just glad that he can be with her. He was so afraid in that final minute that it was all over. And then there's Toby, the young man's face is forever etched into his mind. His final words when he had finished his dying declaration 'Get out of here and make sure he never hurts my cousin or anyone ever again'. As timid as Toby had come across in the previous interview he had seemed resolved to redeem his sins.

Elliot knew that he could never forget that young man and he knew he wouldn't have to look at the words that he had written down verbatim on his notepad to remember them. Toby did indeed have many sins to atone for.

"I think we should take her to a hospital," Olivia whispers hoarsely, indicating the child in her arms who is now balling Olivia's shirt into tiny fists out of pure fear. "I don't think she's had anything to eat or drink in at least two days."

Olivia can still remember the way the young woman was shoved under the crib. She was naked and her flesh had become pallid. It was obvious from the large amount of congealed blood between her legs that she had been raped and the insects had settled to feed, looking as though they had been happily ensconced for quite some time. Just thinking about it, Olivia knows that it will haunt her nightmares for weeks even after they catch Coleman.

Elliot sees Munch and Fin in the crowd and motions them over. As soon as the other two detectives see their colleagues they rush through the crush of people towards them.

"Are you guys ok?" Munch asks out of breath.

Olivia nods "Yeah we're fine," she responds softly in a tone that lets the two newcomers know that emotionally she is still in turmoil.

"Who's the kid?" Fin asks looking at the child that Olivia holds close to her, using her winter coat to shield the girl from the December winds.

"We aren't sure," Elliot informs them "But we know that she needs medical attention. So can you guys keep an eye on things here while Liv and I take her?"

Munch nods "Of course."

Fin gives the little girl a pat on the head "You guys go take care of this little one. Don't worry about things here. We got it under control."

Elliot starts to lead Olivia to the car. Olivia turns back "I found her in one of the top floor apartments." She tells Munch and Fin "There was a murdered woman under her crib. I think she was attacked by Coleman just like Claire Garret." Munch and Fin both nod and Olivia and Elliot head for the car.

"I don't have a car seat for her," Olivia says worriedly as she sits in the passenger seat and holding the girl in her lap, draws the seatbelt across them both before fastening it over the two of them.

"Don't worry the hospital isn't far from here," Elliot reassures her. She nods and holds tight to the child as they set off on their way.

At the hospital, a young red headed nurse helps them. Olivia stands holding the little girl, rocking her gently back and forth in her arms as she and Elliot answer questions about who they are, where they have found the child and what they think is wrong with her. When they finish the triage process, another young nurse with a large amount of brown curly hair takes the child from Olivia and leads the two detectives to an examination room. She places the child on the examination table and begins to look her over.

"Well," the nurse, whose name is Irene says as she looks over the little girl "She appears to be dehydrated. I'll have to start an IV." Irene leaves the room for a moment. She returns with a doctor and the two of them take the child into another room where there is a bed. Elliot and Olivia follow close behind and Olivia tries to maintain eye contact with the small child in an effort to reassure her. The doctor performs his own examination of the little girl and the nurse prepares to put in an IV.

Olivia moves closer to the bed and takes one of the child's tiny hands into hers "Its okay sweetie," she whispers as the girl starts to whimper.

The tiny needle enters the vein in the girl's arm and an ear piercing, heart wrenching scream emanates from the small form on the bed.

"Its ok honey," Irene tells her in a clinical sounding voice "It only hurts for a second."

The IV is placed and the child has calmed down. Irene leaves the room. The doctor stays and talks "Sorry I didn't get the chance to introduce myself before," He says, smiling as he extends his hand "I'm Dr. Smith."

Olivia and Elliot take turns shaking Dr. Smith's hand "How long will she need to be here?" Olivia asks somewhat anxiously.

Dr. Smith looks down at the little girl "Definitely over night maybe two but hopefully we can have her released tomorrow."

Irene returns with a stack of clean diapers and a very small hospital gown. She quickly changes the child's diaper, which Olivia can see is full almost to bursting, and replaces it with a fresh one. Irene also manages to change the child out of her soiled clothes and into the small gown.

Olivia looks in dismay at how the nurse moves without saying hardly a word to the little girl, not even bothering to smile or make eye contact. Thankfully Irene leaves again soon.

"I'm afraid I'll have to go too," Dr. Smith tells them "I have rounds."

"Is it ok if we sit with her?" Olivia asks, hopefully.

"Sure," the doctor smiles as he hurries out the door.

Elliot and Olivia pull up chairs beside the little girl's bed "Hi sweetie," Olivia says in a sweet voice.

The little girl smiles at her.

"How ya doing?" Elliot asks as he leans forward in his chair so that he can see the little girl's face clearly.

The little girl looks at her arm, at the place where the IV enters her vein and frowns.

"Does it still hurt?" Olivia asks.

The little girl shakes her head.

"It's something new," Elliot explains to Olivia "It may not hurt but she doesn't like that its there."

Olivia nods and turns back to the child. She has no idea what to talk about. This child only appears to be about a year old. Olivia wonders if this little girl can talk and if witnessing the murder of the woman whom Olivia can only assume is the girl's mother has made her silent. Its been known to happen before but Olivia has never heard of anything like this in children this young.

Elliot hasn't interacted with children this young in a long time but he thinks he knows a few tricks. He sticks out his tongue and makes a funny face at the little girl. It is a face that had never failed to get giggles from Dickie and Elizabeth when they were little.

The face prevails again as the little one on the bed lets go with a long burst of giggles.

Olivia turns to Elliot and smiles "You are full of surprises," she leans in and kisses him. The kiss grows deeper more quickly than either of them intended and they are forced to pull away long before they would like to by the little cooing noises of the girl as she points to the door.

Olivia and Elliot turn to see Munch and Fin standing in the doorway. Munch is carrying a fuzzy yellow stuffed bunny and Fin has two cups of coffee.

"Hope we're not," Munch pauses and coughs "Interrupting anything." He enters the room setting the bunny on the bed next to the little girl "Here you go little one," he says smiling and ruffling the little girl's hair.

Fin approaches Olivia and Elliot and hands each of them a cup of coffee.

"Thanks," Olivia smiles at Fin.

"Yeah thanks Fin," Elliot says, gratefully excepting the coffee and taking a deep swig of it "I really needed this."

The little one seems totally entranced with her present and the adults take the opportunity to talk quietly.

"The fire is under control," Munch informs them.

"That's good," Olivia says, shakily "Have they recovered the bodies yet?"

"Not yet," Fin says softly.

Olivia looks down at her lap.

"Hey," Munch quickly puts in "You did a great job of getting the people out. The only casualties are Toby Garret and that woman on the eighth floor who no one seems to know."

"Wow," Elliot puts in, trying to cheer Olivia up "The city will probably give you a commendation." He nudges her playfully and smiles at her.

"No one knows who she was?" Olivia asks in a tone that is flat but still sounds surprised.

"No one knew anything about her or the girl." Fin tells her "Everyone we talked to was under the impression that that particular apartment was still empty."

"How can no one know this woman?" Olivia shoots half up out of her chair in anger.

Elliot puts his hand on her shoulder "Easy Liv," he says soothingly "Someone has to know who they are. We'll find out, its just gonna take some time."

"I know," she says calming down and resting her head on his shoulder "It's just so frustrating."

Elliot wraps an arm around her shoulder not caring that Munch and Fin are still in the room "It'll be ok," he says as he moves his hand up and down her shoulder slowly.

"I thought Cragen told you two to keep it out of the office," Munch says with a slight cough.

Elliot and Olivia both turn to look at him. Simultaneously they answer "We're not in the office."

"You're still on the job," everyone turns to see Cragen standing at the door to the room. He is carrying a box of donuts.

"Alright!" Munch says excitedly "It's a party."

"Captain," Olivia begins, she can feel the redness creeping across her cheeks.

"Its ok Olivia," Cragen says entering the room "I just came to see if you two were alright. You can go back to… eh'hem enjoying each others company." Cragen, Munch and Fin all snicker.

Even before Olivia turns back to face Elliot she swears she can feel the heat coming off of his face. She turns and she is proven correct, he is beat red. She gives him a quick peck on the cheek and he breaks out in a wide boyish grin "You ok?" she asks in a whisper.

"Perfect," he whispers back before kissing her on the lips.

"So," Munch turns to Cragen in an effort to change the subject "What kind of donuts did you get?"

Cragen opens the box and displays its contents with a smile. Munch groans, it seems that humor is on the menu today.

Cragen answers, "Why what else John, munchkins."

Everyone in the room, with the exception of the little girl, laughs loudly.

"Is it ok for her to have one?" Cragen asks looking at the still nameless girl.

"I'll go ask the nurse," Olivia says, rising from her chair and heading for the nurse's station.

Olivia returns a few minutes later and the little girl gives a shriek of delight when she sees her again. Olivia is carrying a small container of orange jello and a plastic spoon "She said that Dr. Smith doesn't want to give her solids just yet but that I should try giving her some jello and seeing if she can keep it down." Olivia smiles and sits back down next to the bed.

She adjusts the bed so that the little girl can sit up against the pillow. Elliot watches as Olivia interacts with the child. The first thing that comes to his mind is that she is a natural.

Olivia digs the spoon into the tiny cup of jello and pulls up a small spoon full. She holds it out to the little girl "Do you want some jello sweetie?"

The little girl nods and surprisingly takes the spoon from Olivia and pops the jello into her mouth. A broad smile spreads across the tiny face.

"How was it?" Olivia asks.

The child nods vigorously and smiles as she reaches the spoon towards the container once more.

The rest of the room is forgotten as Olivia and the little girl engage in this dance. Elliot finds himself captivated by how precious the scene in front of him is.

Cragen whispers to Munch who in turn whispers to Fin and the three of them excuse themselves leaving Elliot and Olivia alone with this tiny miracle.

The little girl finishes her jello and snuggles down in the bed with her bunny. Olivia checks her watch, its 2:30 in the afternoon, she isn't sure but she thinks this is an appropriate nap time. That plus all that this child has been through in the past couple of days convince Olivia that the little girl should get some rest.

Olivia tucks the blankets in around the little girl and soon she has drifted off to sleep. Olivia turns to Elliot and motions for him to follow her outside the room. Once they are out in the hallway they spot Munch, Fin and Cragen, they head towards them but are stopped by Dr. Smith.

"Detectives," Dr. Smith says, causing them both to turn and face him.

"Yes doctor?" Olivia asks jumping to the forefront of her mind.

"Is something wrong," Elliot too feels a twinge of apprehension.

"No," Dr. Smith quickly reassures them "I was just going to draw some blood and I wondered if either of you wanted to be with her when I do."

Olivia and Elliot share a brief glance "I'll go," Olivia finally says.

"I'll come with you," Elliot offers.

"You don't have to," she tells him with a smile.

"I don't have to," he says, following her and the doctor back into the room "but," he grabs Olivia around the waist in a quick hug "I want to."

The child is still sleeping and Olivia doesn't want to wake her. Olivia knows by a quick glance at her watch that she has only been sleeping ten minutes. The doctor approaches and Olivia can tell that he is going to startle her when he wakes her so Olivia quickly cuts him off. She pushes in front of him in an effort to reach the child first.

When she does, she gently places a hand on the little one's tiny shoulder "Sweetie," she whispers gently "wake up, the doctor is here."

The little girl's eyes flutter open and she smiles sleepily up at Olivia. Then she sees the doctor with his equipment for taking her blood. She of course can't recognize most of the instruments but she sees the needle and tenses up. She clenches her eyes shut and hugs her bunny close to her. She begins to cry.

"Honey," Olivia says soothingly, sliding into the bed next to her, careful not to disturb the IV and holding her "Its ok, shhh its ok."

The little girl doesn't stop crying and Olivia continues trying to soothe her. Somehow the doctor is able to draw the blood.

"There," he says cheerfully as he packs up his tools and prepares to leave "That wasn't so bad, was it."

The child refuses to look at him. The doctor leaves but Olivia remains in the bed holding the little girl.

Elliot comes over and stands beside Olivia, dropping a gentle kiss on her forehead "That was rough," he tells her.

"Yeah," she smiles faintly up at him "Its so hard, she's hurting and I can't make it better."

"It'll be ok Liv," he tells her as he pulls them both into a hug.

"We have to find out who she is Elliot," Olivia says softly into his chest "She's got no one. She needs someone."

"For now," Elliot says as he looks down at the little girl who has relaxed noticeably "She's got us."

Olivia smiles as she too looks down at the child "Yeah," she nods.

Out in the hall Cragen opens the box of donuts and pops a chocolate glazed munchkin into his mouth. He chews contemplatively before swallowing "I don't want to send this child to ACS without knowing who she is. There's more of a chance that she'll fall through a crack in the system," he holds the box out to Fin.

Fin takes the box and bites into a cinnamon munchkin "Then when we do find next of kin, it'll be next to impossible to find the kid again."

Munch reaches into the box while Fin still holds it and snags a plain donut hole "Why don't Elliot and Olivia take care of her?" he suggests.

"I don't think that that would be advisable," Cragen says, massaging the back of his neck with his non munchkin holding hand.

"C'mon Cap," Fin says, passing the box back to him as he speaks "You saw how Liv was in there with her, she's a natural."

"All the more reason to keep her from getting involved," Cragen tells him firmly "She'll get attached and then we'll find next of kin and she'll be emotionally shattered."

"Captain," Munch protests "She's stronger than you give her credit for besides between her and Elliot, they'll get through anything."

"I hope your right," Cragen passes the box of donuts to Munch and heads for the hospital room to discuss the idea with Elliot and Olivia.

Munch is about to reach into the box of donuts when Fin takes it away from him "Hey," Munch protests.

"These things'll kill you," Fin says smiling as he pops yet another cinnamon munchkin into his mouth.

Munch reaches for the box and Fin holds it above his head as he runs down the hall towards the nurse's station. "Try and keep up old man!" he calls back over his shoulder.

Cragen knocks on the frame of the open door and peers inside. Olivia is curled up with the little girl on the bed and Elliot is watching fondly from a chair close by.

"Hi Cap," Elliot says with a smile, waving the older man towards an unoccupied chair "What's up?"

Cragen looks at the scene in front of him. He knows that it is too late to worry about Olivia and Elliot becoming attached. It is more then obvious that they already are.

TBC


	11. Chapter 11: Hope

Because

Olivia straightens up, momentarily separating herself from the little girl. She faces her Captain "What is it?" she asks concerned.

Cragen clears his throat nervously "We need to talk about this child's living situation."

Olivia looks back down at the child beside her who has scooted up against her. This little girl has had too much instability in the past few hours. Olivia dreads having to hand her over to some ACS case worker to be shuttled off to some foster home. She looks back at the captain and without another thought to the situation she blurts out "I'll take her."

Cragen looks at Olivia, he stares at her trying not to let his gaze give away what he is feeling. He had at first been against the idea of having the child stay with Olivia and when he had seen her cuddled up beside the child in that protective way that seems like second nature to a mother even before she is a mother he had thought that it could potentially be harming to both of them. Now that Olivia is offering of her own accord. He just has a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach that this has the potential to be very painful in the end for all concerned.

But the words that come out of his mouth are nothing if not encouraging "That sounds fine Olivia." Let it not be said that Captain Donald Cragen does not have the utmost confidence in the detectives under his command.

Olivia smiles and looks down at the little girl "Don't worry sweetie its gonna be ok."

Elliot places a hand on Olivia's shoulder. He speaks softly "Liv, are you sure?"

Cragen takes this as his cue to leave and he rises from his chair and goes in search of Munch, Fin and the rest of the donuts.

Once Cragen is out of earshot, Elliot poses the question again "Are you sure?" Olivia looks him straight in the eye and Elliot can see the spark of determination that only Olivia can possibly possess, that inner fire that he finds so beautiful about her. He knows her answer even before she opens her mouth to speak.

"Yes," she says through a broad smile.

"But Olivia," Elliot begins to argue. He knows she has the best intentions but she has no idea how to take care of such a young child and to tell the truth he doesn't know all that much either. Kathy was always the one at home and Elliot's experience was limited at best "You have no idea how to take care of a child."

"I'll learn," she says standing up and moving to the other side of the room. She can sense a fight brewing and she doesn't want to traumatize this little girl anymore than she already has been.

Elliot follows her but continues to speak "You don't have a crib or a changing table or diapers or-"

"I can get diapers," she cuts him off "Look Elliot," she feels rather than hears her voice rising in volume and can't control it "This little girl has nothing in this whole world. I just want to give her some stability. Some God damned stability Elliot!"

Elliot takes a step closer to her and puts a hand on her arm "Maybe we should go outside?" he suggests in a calming tone. He steels a quick glance at the little girl who has become visibly more nervous the louder that Olivia's voice becomes.

"I'm not budging," She grinds out through clenched teeth. She makes a conscious effort to get the volume of her voice back under her control.

"Alright," Elliot gives a small smile of relief. He moves the hand that rests on her arm until it gently caresses her cheek "I only want the best for you and this little girl," he tells her honestly.

She smiles gently back at him, enjoying the sensations that coarse through her body just from the simple feeling of his hand on her cheek "I want to do this," Olivia says, turning to the child "for her, Elliot she needs to be with people she knows and for now that's us." She turns back to Elliot, a plea in her eyes, a plea that he not question her judgment on this, that he stand by her.

Elliot nods, excepting the fact that this argument goes to Olivia "I think I still have one of the old cribs in the attic at home," he admits. Home, he has called it home, truthfully it hasn't felt like home since Kathy took the kids and moved out "I'll drive by and pick it up later."

Olivia smiles "I can do this Elliot. I know I can," she leans in and kisses him hard on the lips. Just as Elliot parts his lips in an effort to deepen the kiss Olivia pulls away "Thank you," she whispers before returning to the kiss.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

An hour later Cragen pokes his head in the door of the room to see a very heart warming sight. The little girl is leaning forward, watching Elliot and Olivia who have drifted off in the uncomfortable hospital chairs. As Cragen enters and walks towards his two detectives the little girl puts a finger to her lips.

Cragen smiles at the child "Are they sleeping?" he asks her in a kind whisper. She nods her head vigorously and holds her bunny tight against her small body. The captain smiles at the innocent little person sitting before him "I'm sorry," he tells her still in a whisper "I have to wake them up now." The little girl nods once more and begins to hum an indistinguishable tune.

Cragen places a hand on Elliot's shoulder and shakes him slightly. Elliot pops his eyes open instantly. He glances first at the bed to see that the child is still there and still alright then he turns to look at Olivia who still dozes comfortably (or as comfortably as one can doze in a hospital chair) beside him. Only after these actions does he notice his C.O standing beside him.

"What's up Cap?" he asks as he straightens up in the chair, "Did they find something?"

"I just came to tell you that the fire is officially out," Cragen begins "the bomb wasn't as effective as Coleman probably would have hoped,"

Olivia begins to stir in the chair. Her eyes flutter open at the mention of their perp's name. She stretches and looks up at Cragen "What happened?" she asks.

Cragen groans inwardly "I was just telling your partner that the fire is out and I was about to tell him that the eighth floor where you found that little girl is still pretty intact."

Olivia shoots up immediately "Let's go," she says to Elliot before turning back to Cragen "Captain could you sit with her until we get back?" she doesn't even wait for a response as she tares out of the room heading for the squad car.

Elliot looks apologetically at his captain "Um…" he begins, trying to figure out what he should say in this situation. "Um…" he begins again but finds that words fail him. How can he possibly explain Olivia's behavior when he doesn't quite understand it himself. Finding that there are no words, he only offers an apologetic nod to his captain as he grabs his coat and runs after his partner.

He rushes down the hallway, past Munch, past Fin, ignoring the protests of an intern as he almost runs him over. He has to catch up with her. Something about her is different, since the explosion something in her has changed. Something he can only describe as fear. As he reaches the doors to the hospital he is comforted by the sight of her, shivering slightly as she leans against the sedan. She hugs herself as the cold December wind whips around her.

Its all only just starting to hit her with the utmost force. She could have lost Elliot. Coleman left that innocent child there to die alone. She has come too close today to breaking down. She can't lose Elliot, she knows that now. She begins to shake, all the while staring at her feet, trying to keep the tears that burn her eyes in place.

She isn't even aware of Elliot as he approaches. He puts a hand on her shoulder and she looks up startled.

Without warning she collapses into his arms, a mass of tears "I don't know what I would have done," she whispers in a voice that can barely make itself heard around the lump in her throat.

"I'm here, I'm here," he strokes her hair as he holds her close to him whispering this simple mantra over and over hoping that his words will have the power to take away her pain. Realization hits him like a Mac truck. He has come so close to losing her as well. Thoughts of his life without her enter his mind, the thoughts move him to his own tears which soon turn into sobs as he holds her tight.

"If anything had happened to you," he whispers hoarsely "I wouldn't have been able to live with myself."

She pulls away from him slightly and looks him in the eye "I guess keeping it away from the job isn't gonna be as easy as we thought," she offers a small sad smile as the tears continue to roll down her cheeks.

Elliot is starting to feel the effects of the cold air and he unlocks the car door, still holding Olivia close to him "Get in," he says as he opens the door for her "We still have a crime scene to process."

She silently slides into the passenger seat and Elliot soon is sitting beside her in the driver's seat. She knows he is trying to avoid what is coming next. If they can't be objective then one of two things has to happen. Either they can no longer be lovers, which is impossible or they can no longer be partners, which is just as impossible. Olivia doesn't say a word as they ride to the crime seen. She tries to put out of her head that this is possibly the last case they will ever work together.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The first thing they notice as they get out of the car is that the building is still standing for the most part. It will most likely be deemed unfit to live in because the structure has been compromised by the fire and explosion but until then, it is their crime scene and they have a job to do.

Olivia carefully follows Elliot as he picks his way through fallen ceiling tiles, broken glass and other such flotsam on the way up to the eighth floor. At the landing of the fifth floor they pause. The floor looks to be entirely destroyed, the steel girders that support the floors above and prevent them from tumbling down are visible and appear to be the only thing that remains. Olivia looks at Elliot and both nod in silent understanding. There is most likely nothing left of Toby Garret. Olivia reaches for Elliot's hand and grips it tight.

They reach the eighth floor. The door to the apartment is already open and CSU techs can be seen dusting for finger prints and collecting things in evidence bags even from where Elliot and Olivia stand at the top of the staircase.

Olivia takes a cautious step into the hall, not yet ready to go into the apartment. Elliot gives her hand a gentle squeeze and she looks up, her gaze meeting his. Brown eyes meet blue for probably the millionth time since she's met him. Never before has the message been so clear 'I'm here. I love you and we'll get through this together.' The brief glance gives them both the strength they so desperately need and together, still holding hands, they enter the apartment.

There is a large sagging hole in the middle of the apartment and they have to navigate carefully around it to where Melinda Warner is kneeling by a body that has already been bagged. The fire damage doesn't seem to be that bad but Elliot is sure that if Olivia hadn't found her, the little girl would most certainly be dead.

"Detectives," Warner greets as she stands, signaling for one of her assistance to remove the body.

Olivia doesn't want to ask but it's her job. Pulling out her notepad and pen she nods in Warner's direction "What've we got?" holding both her notepad and pen means that she can no longer hold Elliot's hand and she is surprised at how vulnerable she feels without the comfort that the simple contact had provided.

Melinda gives Olivia a sympathetic look, By now it is common knowledge that Olivia was the one who discovered this crime scene "Well there's enough left to autopsy," Warner begins "Obvious signs of sexual assault," another pause because no matter how many bodies Melinda Warner has bagged and tagged she still has to fight to keep her composure around all of the end results of humanity's cruelty "Cause of death appears to be blunt force trauma."

Olivia takes her notes meticulously, writing down to the letter everything that Warner has told them. Anything to keep her gaze from wandering the apartment or worse perhaps accidentally locking eyes with one of the many techs that are still roaming the scene. She can feel the eyes on her and Elliot and she doesn't want to know if they stare out of sympathy or disbelief or any number of other emotions she just can't deal with right now. "Was there DNA from the sexual assault?" she asks, still not looking up from her notepad.

"I did the preliminary exam," Warner says, holding up a bag with a few cotton swabs in it "Traces of semen survived. I'll have to wait till I get back to the lab to see if the DNA is usable."

Olivia finally looks up from her notes as Warner begins to leave "Run the results against Clair Garret's rape kit," she calls out.

Warner turns around to face the two detectives "You got a suspect already?" she asks sounding somewhat surprised.

"Yeah," Elliot speaks up for the first time since they entered the apartment "The same guy who set the bomb. We think that the bomb was just to cover up this crime scene."

Warner nods her goodbyes and departs. At the door of the apartment she pauses and turns back for just a moment. Elliot and Olivia are the subject of her gaze. Olivia appears visibly shaken, somehow smaller in a way and Melinda wonders what has happened to bring about this change in her friend. Elliot on the other hand as she observes is looking at Olivia with something more flashing in his eyes. Melinda scratches her head in an effort to identify this new spark. In Elliot's eyes there has always been concern when he looks at Olivia and as Melinda thinks about it there has always been love as well but this… this is neither, this is… it can only be described as terror, a small flash of intense fear, something so small that Melinda wonders if Elliot realizes the feeling himself. She pushes these thoughts from her head and heads back to the morgue.

Elliot puts a hand on Olivia's arm, the most intimate gesture he will allow himself to make in the presents of so many CSU techs. He knows that she still feels like she might lose him at any minute, he knows this because he is feeling the same way. He wants nothing more than the freedom to wrap her in his arms and never let go. But for now this small intimate expression of affection will have to do.

"Detectives," a young CSU tech waves them over to a beat up file cabinet. The expression on his face is one of excitement and his tone is reflective of that excitement as he utters his next words "We hit pay dirt."

Olivia is at the file cabinet in seconds. She hopes that this will be their big break. Perhaps some sort of financial records or something survived the fire "What've you got?" she asks, trying to keep the eagerness out of her voice. An ID for the mother seems almost too much to hope for.

The tech waits for her to pull on her gloves before handing her a small metal box "This was in the file cabinet," he explains "Lucky thing that the vic thought to put it in this box. The contents were shielded from most of the fire damage."

"What contents?" Olivia asks no one in particular as she opens the small box. A small, official looking piece of cardboard, approximately the size of a three by five index card falls into her hand. She stares at it for a moment "Elliot," she calls hoarsely. He needs to see this too.

"What is it?" Elliot peers over her shoulder at the card. He surreptitiously places a hand at the small of her back as he does so.

The thing that they both stare at is a birth certificate. Across the top is written the name Hope Coleman. It goes on to say 'date of birth October 17, 2004'. Then the next part makes both the detectives shiver.

"Oh God," Olivia whispers as her hands begin to shake slightly.

"Father," Elliot begins, he has to say the words out loud for his suddenly numb mind to process them "Henry Coleman."

The fact that the man who wanted this child to die is also her father is bad enough but when Olivia reads the next name, the name of the child's mother, her blood runs cold. The words pass her lips in an almost inaudible whisper "Mother: Marie Benson." The certificate falls to the floor as Olivia turns, suddenly in need of air and flees from the apartment.

Elliot retrieves the card and puts it back in the box which he puts inside a pocket of his winter coat. He runs after Olivia, giving no explanation to the baffled tech as he brushes past him.

"Olivia!" he calls as he chases her down the stairs of the building.

She doesn't even falter, doesn't look back at him as she runs. She runs in the hopes that she can escape from the constant pain that seems to be stalking her. Tears burn her eyes and her vision blurs. Her running feet can no longer avoid the debris that lies in her path. She is almost to the first floor when she finally loses her balance and falls. She sits in the pile of dirty ceiling tiles in utter defeat.

"Olivia," breathlessly Elliot kneels beside her "Are you alright?"

The question seems so ridiculous to Olivia. No she is not alright. She feels like she has been hit by a ton of bricks. She wraps her arms around Elliot and wordlessly leans into his chest as she silently cries.

"Wanna talk about it?" he asks quietly as he strokes her hair.

"Not really," she mutters into his shirt, her voice cracks ever so slightly.

"Who is Marie?" he asks gently.

A uniformed officer walks down the stairs and pauses staring at the two detectives on the ground. Elliot gives him a reassuring nod and waves him off before turning his attention back to Olivia.

"Second cousin," Olivia explains "I really haven't seen her since she was born."

Elliot places a gentle kiss on the top of her head "I'm so sorry Liv," he whispers as the hand that strokes her hair moves to caress her cheek.

Olivia makes an attempt to wipe her eyes but the tears continue to fall "She would have been eighteen," she speaks regretfully about the distant relative she will now never get the chance to know "She was way to young to be a mother," she pulls away from Elliot and stares at her own lap "She was the most beautiful baby. I only held her once but I knew…" she trailed off. She looks up at Elliot "You know how like that moment where you say to yourself 'this feels right'? I knew that I loved my little cousin and I…" she trails off again as she feels a sob coming on but she can do nothing to stop it "I would have done anything to protect her," she buries her face into Elliot's chest once more.

Elliot can't think of anything to say to take her pain away and that fact alone is killing him, added to the other factors that have made this day hell, Elliot feels like collapsing to the ground and never getting up again. The only reason he hasn't crumbled yet sobs into his chest even as he thinks his self destructive thoughts "Olivia," he finally whispers.

She pulls back again, this time successfully wiping the tears from her eyes and suppressing any more from falling "Yeah?" asks meekly.

"Let's go pick up that crib for Hope," he suggests.

Hope. The name brings a faint smile to Olivia's lips. Hope, her second cousin once removed, an appropriate name for such a troubled time. Olivia's smile grows a bit wider as she gives a small nod "Yeah," she agrees.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It doesn't take them long before the crib with its sheets and a hand me down baby blanket are set up at Olivia's apartment. The two of them then head back to the hospital. It is 5:30pm when they walk through the door of Hope's hospital room.

Elliot had called Cragen and informed him of what they had found out so Cragen had been calling the little girl by her name and it had had a surprising affect on her.

Olivia smiles as she enters the room. Hope is sitting on the bed, looking as cute as ever giggling as Munch and Fin sing 'I'm a little teapot' complete with the dance.

"Hi boys," Olivia can't hold back the small chuckle that escapes when she sees them "How's it going?"

Munch smiles down at Hope "We've been having lots of fun haven't we?" he asks her. Hope just giggles at him.

"We've been singing Hopes favorite song," Fin adds as he sinks into a chair, grateful for the excuse not to do 'I'm a little teapot' anymore.

"She told you?" Olivia asks in surprise. After all the last time she had seen Hope, the little girl hadn't said a word.

Hope finally turns her head so that she can see Olivia and Elliot. Her already happy face breaks into an expression of pure excitement and elation. Her mouth opens and she squeals in enthusiastic delight "Wivvie! Ewiot!"

TBC

A/N: Well there's chapter eleven. There's a lot going on in this one. Please review.


	12. Epilogue

**Because**

**Epilogue**

**A/N: Hey, remember this story? LOL. So I promised that I'd finish it before Christmas 2006 and I know I'm cutting it a little close but… Anyway, I hope you all enjoy and as always, please review. **

**SIX MONTHS LATER**

"It is the ruling of this court that from this day forward, Olivia Benson and Elliot Stabler shall be the lawful parents of Hope Marie Stabler." The judge bangs his gavel and the courtroom erupts into a sea of hugging and shouts of 'Congratulations'.

Elliot looks to his right at the woman who only two months before had agreed to be his wife. In her arms is the toddler who has so quickly captured his heart. Her curly blonde hair is adorned with a pink bow and she looks to him like a little angel in her powder blue dress. He leans forward and gives Olivia a gentle kiss on the lips "Congratulations mom," he whispers with a smile.

She returns his smile "Same to you dad."

Hope begins to fuss in her mother's arms "Daddy," she says as she wiggles free and Elliot scoops her into a hug. She had been referring to him and Olivia as 'Mommy' and 'Daddy' for months now but today it is official.

They head out of the courthouse and into the warm early summer day. Somehow, the light seems brighter now. The New York air seems just a little fresher today. Elliot opens the door to the back seat of the car and straps Hope into her car seat. He places a kiss on her forehead "I love you baby girl," he whispers.

"Love you too Daddy," Hope says through a yawn. It has been a long day for the twenty month old and all she wants right now is to go to sleep.

"I think she's gonna want this," Olivia says as she pokes her head in the car "Here you go sweetie," she smiles gently at her daughter as she hands her the yellow stuffed rabit that Uncle Munch had given her all those months ago in the hospital.

"Bun Bun," Hope smiles sleepily as she takes the toy from her mother and holds it close.

Olivia slides into the passenger's side of the car and Elliot begins the drive to their house. After a couple of minutes, Hope is out like a light in the back seat. Olivia turns to Elliot "Have I told you today that I love you?" she asks.

"Yes," he grins "But I never get tired of hearing you say it."

Olivia smiles warmly at her husband "I love you," she says softly.

"I love you more," he returns playfully.

"I don't think you could," she responds in a back and forth that they have perfected over the months "It's impossible for you to love me more than I love you."

"Really?" Elliot asks with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah," Olivia flashes him a grin reserved solely for him. After all this time, they have settled into their new lives and find them much more satisfying than their old ones.

Cragen has pulled innumerable strings for them to remain partners and there isn't a day that goes by that Elliot and Olivia don't thank him for it. But infinitely more fulfilling than the job, is the little girl who snores softly in the back seat of their car as they drive home. Olivia never knew that she could love motherhood so much and even though Elliot had been a father long before they ever knew Hope, every day is a new adventure for him as well.

They reach the apartment building and Elliot pulls into a parking space. Olivia gets out of the car and as smoothly and quietly as she can, so as not to wake her, she lifts Hope from the car seat. The little girl stirs "Mommy," she moans softly against Olivia's neck.

"Shhh," Olivia rubs a hand over Hope's tiny back "We're home sweetie," she smiles at Elliot as they pass through the elevator doors "We're home."

**A/N: Okay, probably one of the shortest epilogues ever and I'm sorry but like I said, I'm cutting it close on my deadline. I might write a sequel somewhere down the line but it'll have to wait until I've finished some of my other stories. If I do write a sequel, I'll probably write it in past tense instead of present because writing in present tense is what made this story hard for me to continue. I hope you enjoyed this story.**


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